Is there a place here for someone like me?

You are not perverted. Not at all. How is it perverted to wear another gender's society-assigned clothing? There is this horrible double-standard that men have to deal with in regards to clothing choices. Girls can "cross-dress" by wearing suits and people barely seem to bat an eye (they may automatically leap to the conclusion of lesbian, but that's another matter for another day). But men have to deal with all this crap about skirts and dresses being somehow satanic when worn by them! Ridiculous!

You can cross-dress and enjoy playing with gender roles without ever needing to identify as trans. Along those lines, some incredibly butch women I know who strap on and pack all the time still consider themselves to be women. Gender isn't fixed. You don't need to fall into package A or B. You are simply a man who enjoys wearing clothing. There is not a thing wrong with that.

And just so you know that I'm not bullshitting you, I cross-dress. Not all the time, but I do see it as a part of my gender web identity. I still consider myself to be a woman though even if I imagine myself as the "male role" in female relationships. Also, I think cross-dressing men are super-hot. If you had any interest in girls, I would nab you for myself in naught point two seconds.

Who are you?
You are you. And you are awesome.

Also, a quick note, you should go buy your own girls clothing. That way, you can get better sizes and you won't piss off your girlfriends by nicking their stuff. If the assistant snaps at you and you don't want to deal with explaining cross-dressing, you could just say you are the same size as your significant other or it was for a dare or something. But I don't think you should have to keep it a secret.

 

I think cross dressing is healthy and normal.

think about how tabboo it used to be for women to wear pants. That was considered cross dressing. I think in our culture boys are taught feminine characteristics are bad, and they aren't. They are HUMAN characteristics =). Some of us just embrace or have them more than others.

you're fine in my book =)

 

Shyv, there's nothing wrong with liking to wear women's clothes. (Although I'd suggest buying your own instead of stealing your sister's.) Many gay men do. Some are cross-dressers, some are drag queens, and some just prefer the look or feel of women's clothes. And really, it doesn't matter which (if any) of those categories you feel you belong to. They're all OK.

Feel free to PM me if you want to talk about this one-on-one, all right?

Lex

 

I agree with all of the above! There really is nothing wrong with liking to crossdress! A lot of gay men do it, a lot of straight men do it, for all kinds of reasons, and none of them I would consider perverted for it! The feeling of being abnormal is all in your mind!
I don't think anyone here would think less of you for it! In fact, finding the courage to tell us something that's on your mind is something to be proud of!

As for who you are: the question of identity is hard to answer, and maybe you shouldn't try to get a definite answer! Maybe you just are all of these things, in a combination that just doesn't always fit the stereotypes. But you know what? Everyone is like that! They might hide it, but everyone really does have conflicting feelings sometimes.

From this post, and others, it's clear that you're a nice guy. Just accept that how you feel and what you want to do can vary over time. And what you do or want at one time might be different from what you do or want at other times. But that just makes you more interesting!

Take care! (*hug*)

 

There is most definitely a place for you here; I think a couple of other ECers cross-dress sometimes. As a girl, I definitely do the shirt and tie thing, and it's not too different - dressing in clothing you feel good and natural indoesn't make you perverted at all, even if it's different to what society says is acceptable. You're not a bad person at all (*hug*)

And cross-dressing isn't a problem. The problem is that society has drilled it into you that you shouldn't cross-dress. It doesn't mean you want to be a woman, the same way me wearing a shirt and tie doesn't mean I want to be a man. Being male doesn't mean you have to fit every male trait out there - there's a huge number of guys out there who are more sentimental, who like Glee, and that doesn't make them any less male. If you're a guy who likes cross-dressing, that's what you are - a guy who likes cross-dressing, not a pervert or gender confused or anything. You're far from alone. (*hug*)

 

I know everyone else has said it, but I feel the need to add in. There's nothing wrong with cross-dressing or being gay or acting differently than society tells you your gender is "supposed" to act. Gender barriers are stupid. Just act the way YOU want to act. Be yourself. If you want to wear clothes from the ladies' department--if wearing them makes you happy, and you feel damn good when you wear them--then you should wear clothes from the ladies' department!

I also want to add that, like many of the previous posters, I cross-dress all the time. I honestly feel more comfortable (and not just because the clothing is comfortable, but I feel emotionally confident and happy) if I'm wearing boys' clothes. On the inside I completely still feel like a girl...just a girl in boys' clothing. My dad thinks it's weird, and some of my friends think it's weird, but I do it because it makes me happy, and that's what's really important. And there's nothing wrong with that.

 

it doesn't even matter who's clothes you wear Just wear what you want!

People thought I was strange for wearing my mum's old knitted jumper that's 3 sizes too big for me and covered in badges, but I didn't care. People thought I was stange for sewing ears onto my hoodie (not real ears), but I didn't care. People thought I was strange for buying a pair of size 9 knee high boots from a carboot sale, but I didn't care.

As long as you dont care what anyone else thinks, it doesn't matter how you dress, what you look like, what you do

And besides, I think cross dressers are epic

 

awwh dont feel like that!

its absoloutely fine, and dont feel like you need a sex change, just do what you want and dress how you want!

 

Nothing totally awful about it... (not for me at all)

I be more concern about the cancer than that.

 

You're not hurting anyone so what is so wrong about cross dressing?
Hell they have shows and conventions for cross dressing.

I think you're letting other people's opinions affect your self confidence.

If it's what you want to do then by God go do it.

I've said it before and I'll say it again (a little rephrased though) Being gay and wearing women's clothes only part of you, it is not what defines you.

 

Oh and I love soft piano music too, moonlight sonata is one of favorites. Very relaxing after a shitty day.

 

(*hug*) there's a place here for everyone.

 

:smilewave Hi there. I see I'm not alone on this bus.

I know exactly what you mean. It confuses the hell out of me. I honestly feel that I am in some indeterminate state between male and female. It is like my my body is male, my mind female. Yet there is no is not desire to bring them into sync, yet at the same time there is a schism.

 

Boo, there is room for EVERYONE here. Don't be ashamed of who you are, you're a beautiful person and you need to accept yourself! Instead of thinking you have some awful perversion, just be yourself and see where it goes. I think doing that would help you figure out better who you are.
(*hug*)(*hug*)

 

Again, I don't know your whole story, but can't you buy some things for yourself? You can always claim it's for your sister, or a female friend. Or don't you have a good "storage spot" so you can secret that stuff away?

Lex