Warning: What you are about to read is very fem and may seem disturbing to some readers. Readers discretion is advised. Err... Well... Since this year, I have been in and out of so many relationships. All of them are with guys older than me. I think its kinda inevitable, since my bff calls me "the girl in the relationships" and I am a 17 year old who is in his final year of college which is not quite popular where I am from. Some may view me as a little mature for my age, but I am honestly a very childish person and I accept that. As said earlier, since this year I have been with 6 guys, ages 39, 35, 35, 29, 18 and my present bf is 19. He is different from my other bfs where I ether felt like they were trying to buy me with lots of expensive gifts, or they were just dating me because of my appearances or they were just with me because they wanted to be me. This guy I am with now I guess is allot more age appropriate, is in the same boat as I am (financially) so I dont have to worry about him trying to buy me off, he is much taller than I am in comparison to my other bf's which was something I was not comfortable with and he treats me really delicate. He is like the Prince Charming I always wanted! D; If there is anyone here, that when their partner kisses them, they have to tip and their left leg pops then :lol: they would better understand. The problem is, he is bi. He is very attractive, and even for a very confident person like me, in my eyes he makes me seem like last year's news. Plus, he is an exchange student with a really hot accent, very masculine (so all the girls in my class hawk him) and he is a really good flirt! My bff worries that I made a mistake going out with a Bisexual, seeing he seems unsure of what he even wants. Also, even with all the love I have developed inside for him, I fear him dumping me for another (especially if its of the opposite sex). See, (here goes the rant) I have never been dumped by anyone in my life...I usually am the one to walk out of relationships. Somehow, I have a feeling karma is going to get me this time as I deeply truly care for someone this time...except I still have the same Diva-ish attitude I always had with guys. You know, the attitude where, I so dont need you. Do as i say or the highway, I could care less what you think, kinda attitude. I even told him "I am so evil, vindictive and manipulative; why do you put up with me?!" And he said thats the reason why he loves me. Kissed me on the forehead and walked away. -I know. I still dont get it ether!:tantrum::eusa_doh: Here is the over anylising part. He is very charismatic and outgoing. I am an intrinsic internet geek. He has lots of friends for someone who has only been in jamaica for 3 months, I have only about 2 friends at school. He flirts with the girls around campus and tells me to loosen up, and "mingle" which really annoys me! because all I want to do as of late is be around him. (Which is odd, cuz I am never usually clingy type, if u know what I mean) :dry: When he is around, he tells me not to think of it too much as he is just being "friendly" and he even pulled the old cliche on me about "If I wanted to be with them I would have been with them, but I am in bed with you...arnt I?" and I can't help but always think about him, the things he does that distracts me and worst, losing him. Am I really over anylising this? Am I being paranoid? Honestly EC, help me out here. I need to know what I am doing wrong. I have changed soo much for this one. Its hurts me deep inside. I dont want to change (into a softer person) and end up losing in the end(my man and my dignity, that is). Alex.
in my opinion, that really isn't a good attitude to have about it. If you're going to fear for his fidelity, make it for reasons other than his orientation. A commitment is a commitment. If i were with a man or a woman, it's a commitment and i wouldn't philander. Ever. I have had it done to me and it makes me sick. I don't even look at anyone else when i am in a relationship. i'm not trying to rip into you for having that attitude, but just to let you know, when i hear it it drives me up the wall. are you absolutely SURE he is flirting?
Honey, you would have to see it to believe it. How about in Mixology class. He takes a cherry out a jar and pops in in his mouth and kisses a girl who has a crush on him...WITH THE CHERRY IN HIS MOUTH! :tantrum: In his mind he is maybe saying "I want to pop your cherry" in her mind she is probably saying "OMG. OMG!" ...but in my mind..."I want to pop your neck:icon_twis " Ok. I get what your saying about the orientation part. I guess thats how he feels too. But I'm sorry if I feel threatened by it! D; I...I....I am just so confused! :bang:
Your being paranoid. But from were im standing it looks like you REALLY need to not be so all over him for being bi or flirting, because you said yourself your less than perfect. You have to let him be less than perfect too, or your relationship is not going to work. If the flirting is a big problem for you, have a heart to heart with him. Ask him if he could try and tone it down, and maybe even try and work on the diva-ish attitude or something else like that for him? You gotta give a little to get a little! One of the fastest ways to kill a relationship is to try and fix it when its not broken. If your doing fine, then try not and freak out so much that it no longer IS fine.
Well, it all feels like your afraid to loose him because he's worth keeping, just try not to loose because of that. I mean, feeling a little jealous is ok and even good, but when you start freaking out it stops being so fun! I'd actually find it really flattering if I could be with a guy that everybody wants... And actually find it quite hot the whole flirting with her but sleeping with me (but than again... I'm a freak). The only thing that kind of annoys me is the take on bi people... I thought the best part of being gay is that you no longer have to be worried about people's takes on what's your taste... Jus't cuz you like men doesn't mean you like every single man right? That's the same for him. Of course I can't actually understand you part but I do think you should try to have fun with it all and (please don't with me dead bu...) you should try to loosen up hehe. Life is already bad enough, enjoy Mr. Prince Charming and lemme know if any of his royal siblings are single (ok I meant brothers Ha!)
Oh my gosh. T_T I spoke way too soon. *sigh* Imma just cut my losses. We were talking on the phone, just a little while...and he was like... "I need space, just for about 2 weeks. Ok?" So I said "Whatever is bothering you, say it! Get it off your chest" He says"Alex, there are some things some people dont tell their partners you know?" So I am like, "Oh come on. I rather you tell me what's up than not speak or see me for 2 weeks. Please tell me!!" and he rages out of no where "No! Its something I have to figure out on my own! Its not you!" "Then what is it!?" "Just stop! ok! Its not always about you! Your so spoilt!" (I can't even believe he said that out loud! :O ) "Wow....wow D. Wanna hear a joke? " "ok.." He says. "You! " *hang up* *He calls back* "What was that all about?" "Take all the space and time you want. I won't be waiting- He interjects, "Oh please. What's the joke in that?!" "Just leave me alone" *Hang up again* *He SMS me "I hope you can live down those words. Cuz I can." T_T Its over...isn't it? :tears: Karma really IS bitch!:tears:
I found it flattering at first. Now its like a nightmare. I guess even for freaks like me, I got limits.
really sorry it went down that way bro... (*hug*) He knows you're upset now though. It's really quite selfish and unfair of him to demand time alone without telling you why. Tell him that, and try to stay calm if you can. One thing not to do: Don't break up with him just to prove that you were right all along and it was doomed from the start. Self sabotage can be a source of terrible regret.
To me is sounds like you're rather self destructive sexyalex. I kind of get the impression that you have trouble being content with what you have; seems like you either need to reach for something newer, bigger and better or improve what you already have. I think it was a bit selfish of him to leave you in the dark like that, but sometimes things aren't spoken not because they don't want to say it, but because they don't know how. I assume that by the time you update this thread something else will have happened but in advance, I hope you react/ed in a rational and calm manner. I know it sounds cliche but it does sound like it's a "It's not you, it's me" situation, and sometimes, although you have the right to be kept up to date, it's better to not be involved or to try and help. Remember, certain outcomes are inevitable. If he is struggling with sexuality then try and be supportive irrelevant of where it leaves you. Communicate, without getting angry or irrational and things should sort them selves out. Remember, it's not all about you!
Rawr. Yes to the first, yes to the second but no to the third. You are right in some factors...like plainly put, I have a low attention span! But we talked today (and gosh I have not eaten or slept well since our last convo) but this one was in person and a more comforting outcome. HAHAHA.:lol: Sorry its, just funny how people think differently. So, I finally got it out of him and he said it was that I don't "understand" what he is going through. He further explained he is home sick from being so far away from his family and I he did not want to run to me because he wants to be the "stronger" one in the relationship. Lol He gets along well with everyone for a transfer student if u ask me? But ...anyhow. So then he explains: "you are the strongest person I have ever met- (BS, he is always being so protective and even willing to kick asses for me.) -you don't care what people say about you. Your the smartest guy in school and I feel intimidated being with u" (Also BS since very little people know of us and...I am not the hot british dude that all the girls tails like a pup! <_<) He cried in my lap, and I apolopised and so did he. I took him home and my mom invited him to dinner and he seems happy. I know I am suppose to help but I can't help myself when I see my friends sad...especially my only bf I actually fell in love with. I will never be able to fill the gap he is missing in his soul for his home. But, I will try my best to make him comfortable being away from home. Its the least I can do for him treating me so delicatley O_O Its was funny though. He started crying and I had a " look on my face. I was like..."OMG, is that all?!" He says "well..." "And here I am thinking ur breaking up with me!" "What?! Why would I? Your weird and freaky and all, but that's what I love about u! " Then he hugged me. So I said "Your the one to talk! And never ever do that again! I lost 10 pounds! >:O " Lol! Thanks for all the help u guys ^^
