So I've been really upset latley half the time ild just be bawling my eyes out because i just couldn't handle the fact that I was gay, I mean i had accepted that yes I was but i didn't like it at all. So yesterday i was crying with my face down on my desk chatting to some friends on face-book.(I know strange) when i just sat up and started giggling and couldnt stop like something in my head just snaped and turned tears to giggles Is that weird I guess I'm more conformable with the fact that I like men, Idk it was just odd:eusa_doh:
I don't think it's odd. I was the same way. I just reached a point where I was like "And you thought THAT was a problem?" and started laughing my ass off. I'm glad you're finally getting comfortable in your own skin. (*hug*)
No worries man. I locked myself in isolation for a month in first year uni only out to do homework while I cried myself to sleep and had bad dreams. Life gets ok. Try joining a LGBT group in your area if you can. It might help seeing normal members of our community that are happy.
I've been there. It's a terrifying thing thinking about losing an entire possible future with, what could amount to, a flip of the coin. When I finally came out to myself, I did start crying. I was smiling, but I was still crying. Just remember, things can only get better!
Dont be alarmed if you go through a roller coaster type effect for a few months were you have your happy days and then your days you cant stand yourself. It happens. But other than that, congrats
I have to agree. Coming out to yourself gives you a great amount of relief, and in my experience you can't come out to yourself until you accept who you are.
Congratulations It's nice to hear that you're beginning to be comfortable. I've had moments like that, too, it's wondeful when laughter is what you do the most
it's not odd. Your brain can only handle so much bad stuff before it is forced to switch gears. It's the funeral syndrome. Ever heard the one about the lady that lost her best friend, she cried and cried for days, but when the funeral came around all she could think of were the good times and she started laughing. Anyway, It's cool that you're starting to accept who you are, but remember: being gay is not who you are, it is just part of who you are. You're the same person you have always been, you're just gay now too.
I'm glad things are looking up for you. You can change your status now. You're all out gay. No longer teetering.
