taste in men

Maybe its time for the dreaded *deep breath* *drum roll* ...lowering of expectations?

Being gay we automatically get stuck in the kiddie pool of dating when the hetero's get the full length pool. If you put *too* many things on your "must have" list and *too* many things on your "must NOT have" list you will find the kiddie pool can be a lonely place for you. The person you described probably is out there, but said person could be in a different country all together. You might want to try and broader the type of guys your looking for.

Wanting a guy with "style" is nice and everything, but thats something you can work on. You might want to think more about what you want on the inside of someone and look for that, because the outside can be altered and changed, but the inside not so much. (Not saying you have to date someone who looks like a troll because he is a good person, but definitely painting one exact picture of the type of guy your after can be dangerous)

 

i love you you frikin genious (*hug*)

 

I like interesting looking people.

Intelligence and personality are more important to me than looks. Cliche, I know.

 

I'm ALWAYS attracted to the douchy, dick guys.
People tell me he's a huge dick or is fake nice to you; and there have been many a time when the guys are straight up dicks to my face. But no matter what I hear I always go back, saying " they're hot so it's ok if they're a douche."

 

I'm detecting a theme, here, I can't quite put my finger on it...:icon_wink

My suggestion is start on the emotional/intelligent level and...well, most gay guys have style, just saying. Maybe if you crank it back to just "punk" you can more easily get somewhere.

Now as for myself, just keep yourself neat. That is about all. And have a taste in food, and be a little geeky. After that, we can talk. Or not talk, if you like. We can skip the talking. I'm cool either way. :icon_wink

 

although i bet you'd like to! ow ow!

Anyway, it's fine to have preferences, just don't have them be so important in your mind that you are totally closed off to anyone who doesn't fit your criteria. I love the jock look, but neither of my major crushes have been particularly jockish, nor do I anticipate being in a relationship with a jock (at least, probably not a stereotypical one).

Be an equal opportunity lover.

 

oh, touche!

 

I too agree , I love you Greggers

 

not to undermine greggers, but the post indicates he doesn't want people who do "smoking, drugs, sleeping around, and generally being immature."

personally, if this is the list, I think it's easily achieved. probably with a little more searching, but it's definately possible to find a decent person who is mature.

 

I don't really have a certain taste in men. Though I HATE guys who are jerks. No matter how hot, I can't stand them! I'm not really into any type. I like a bit of each. Haha I consider myself a bit of a rocker but strangely i'm not really attracted to guys that are rockers. Oh and also I don't like emo/gothic guys and girly guys. Just not my thing.

 

I can put my whole hand on it :icon_wink

 

Long term.... for life type, I want a guy who is tall and rugged, but doesn't need to be attractive (he could be gross looking) just tall.

or a guy who is exactly like me physically (rare though)

For short term I look for what I can get (which is what I only care about).

 

I've found that younger guys tend to have a much more narrow focus. They more often have a very specific type, and tend not to look beyond that. Honestly, there's nothing really wrong with that, but I'd suggest simply keeping an open mind. That doesn't mean you have to force yourself to date guys you think are ugly. But quite often, the attraction builds. You'll meet a guy, maybe hang out for awhile, and as you do so, you'll find yourself finding him more and more attractive...even if he isn't "your type". So don't immediately toss guys to the side if they don't catch your eye or make you pudgy in the drawers. Stay social, stay friendly, and see what happens.

Lex

 

unfortunatly reality never lives up to the fantasy. When we think about people we like we always imagine them in a perfect setting with the attituded we want them to have, but that just isn't life.

And, don't start thinking you're shallow becuase you like emo guys, that is just a look for find sexy; but, if you can never be with a guy unless he is emo then you might be swimming in the shallow end of the pool.

 

Yep, this is how it goes sometimes... In fact, it's how it went with my current BF and I...

 

You and me both dude.

 

>>>yep, im shallow, shallow is what i am, i just dont like to admit it. in fact i hate to admit it. its only now i realise my stupid flaw. i have spent too much time living in a dream world, its probably about time i thought about reality, but maybe reality is too shit to face, i like my dream world lots, but its about time i realise its just a dream? i just dunno what is what

I guess that all depends. There's nothing wrong with fantasizing about a certain type of guy, or making a move towards guys who look like that. You might end up with somebody who fits your fantasy to a T. But, as I said, it's best to keep an open mind. Do you have other gay friends? If not, befriend some. Even if they're not your "type", that's fine - just decide if they might make a decent friend. This will put you further into the "real world", and then you might find your tastes changing somewhat.

Lex

 

Remember too that there are a lot of things that limit the number of potential boyfriends. Yes, being gay limits your number of potential partners. And a certain look or emotional intelligence does as well. But you're still 18 and presumably just finishing up high school. Your 'world' is still pretty small. Going to university or entering the work force or travelling can expose you to a MUCH larger population of potential partners than you've met in your 18 years so far.

Also remember that many people haven't found that 'special someone' (or a special anyone for that matter) by the age of 18. I certainly hadn't.