Okay, so here it goes. Got a friend--a one-time best friend who I tell most everything to. I know that he's bi, and he knows now that I'm questioning. Let's call him R. R broke up with his girlfriend--trust issues about the bi thing, and other issues as well. She's not happy, he's not happy, but that's only to be expected. Here's the issue: Day after he breaks up with his girlfriend, he starts messing around (near as I can tell) with another guy who at least says he's gay--might be simply for attention. I do not like this second guy (call him B) because he is a) a liar b) a bad influence in the field of drugs/alcohol/etc. c) an unkind person all around. If R was going to hook up with ANYBODY, I would want it to be ANYBODY but B. It pains me to watch them together, and to know that R has no idea about the dangers that B poses. However... It is not out in the open about them--it's a rumor or two, and them being a little more touchy-feely than usual. I want to confront R in some way to tell him about B being...not the best person for him, or at least illuminate the not-so-good side of B's character. Do I do so? If so, how should I go about it? Sorry if this is really vague and all over the place. I will clarify if it needs clarification.
Well, the choice to talk to him is something you'll have to decide for yourself. You could talk to him now, wait and see if it progresses some more, or just let him work through it. However, if you do decide to tell him, try to help him see that you're just trying to help. Also, don't tell him he "shouldn't" see this guy, as this might just create the feeling that you don't support him. However, you can try and tell him: "This is what I know about B that I think you should know. I don't know if this changes what you guys have, but I think it's better you have the most information possible. And, no matter what you decide to do with this guy, I'll support you, but please, listen to a few things I have to say." You just want to make sure you don't drive him away. Not sure it that helped, but I hope everything turns out okay for your friend. (*hug*)
