Making positive changes

Yesterday i signed up for an art class, just a studio drawing class but it was one of the first decisions i've made recently on my way to being happy. I also contacted the local pflag chapter and have decided to go to the next meeting.

I'm a very shy, very introverted person and when i moved away from my friends and my support back in my home country i found it very hard to reconnect with people. I still do o some extent. I have a few friends here but no one close, so i figured if i go out and join things i might meet new people. I'm not looking for a date, i'm just kinda tired of being alone so much.

I'm going to make the effort, i even went out yesterday and bought new clothes. I want to get to grips with me finally I've spent 4 years sitting ignoring the blatant problems in my life and now i'm taking steps to fix things.

oh and i found out recently that one of my close friends from high school is gay and is living with her partner; i might try and get back in touch with her.

 

yes, i had a good group of friends through uni and then i moved to america and lost touch with all but a few of them. When i came here it was such a culture shock that i found it hard to get involved with anyone socially. I work with my family so i see them more than i'd like really and don't really get a chance to meet new people. Plus i find it hard to trust people and mostly give off a very bad first impression.

But like i said, i'm joining some groups and will attempt (even though it will be very hard) to be social and nice.

 

I had a friend in uni who told me (once we'd been friends a few years) that the first time she met me i bitch faced her so badly she almost didn't speak to me. Luckily for me she's made of tough stuff and once we got past the initial awkwardness we got to be good friends.

I don't see it as there being anything wrong with me; i just think that if someone can get past my awkward first impressions then they are worth having around. Once people get to know me i'm lovely.

I mostly don't feel like socialising, but sometimes i make myself go out and usually end up having a good time. i think the thought of being social is worse than actually being social.

 

I don't know what to tell you, but i bet people don't always think badly of you, and if they do just try to brush it off and stay positive.

I have the happy fortune of not usually caring what other people think of me, hence i was oblivious to giving out a bad first impression when i was younger.