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Just venting!

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by BrownBoi89, Nov 5, 2009.

  1. BrownBoi89

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    So I was working on a paper last night, and I think the stress of working on it finally made me snap and now I feel broken. In other words keeping my sexuality a secret has finally gotten to me and now I am just dying to come out. I've told my sister and 3 of my friends, they were all very supportive, but now I want to tell my parents, the problem is my great aunt is in the hospital, so it feels like me telling them now when they're stressed seems kinda selfish. Should I wait? A part of me says yes, but now I feel so numb inside that at this point I am truly not happy keeping it inside. I'm also thinking about sending a message to one of the friends I told, just so I can vent to someone I know. Any advice or comments would be appreciated. Thanks.
     
  2. AgentS

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    Personally I think waiting to tell your parents because of the Aunt situation is a good idea. It's never a good idea to tell someone at a time of high stress. However I absolutely think you should vent to someone you have told. I vented to the first person I came out to several times. She always had great advice and comments. It's not good to keep all of that stress bottled up.
     
  3. beckyg

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    I think it would depend on your Great Aunt's condition. Is she stable? Is she going to get better or are they expecting her not to make it. If its too serious, I'd wait just a little longer. I know its hard but you want your parents to react positively and they may not do that if they are really stressed out.
     
  4. BrownBoi89

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    Thanks for the quick replies both of you and for your advice. I messaged a friend and doing so made me feel a bit better. Now I'm just waiting for her response. My great aunt is really old, so I'm not sure she if she'll make it, so I guess I'll wait a bit before I tell my parents. Maybe I'll just come out to some more of my friends before telling my parents. It might make me feel less stressed about not being open about my sexuality. Thanks again guys, hopefully I'm not being too much of a drama queen.
     
  5. Filip

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    You're not being a drama queen! It's perfectly natural to want to stop lying.

    I'm guessing that if your aunt's condition is not looking really good, it might be best to put it off just a little longer. On the other hand, there's always some excuse or another not to come out just yet. And if you feel like you're going to go into mental breakdown if you don't tell them, it might be best to tell them anyway.

    But coming out to friends is a good thing! And if it can help buy you a bit of time, I'd definitely say that it's the best option while your parents are otherwise occupied.
     
  6. x2x2x2x2y2

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    Well if it looks like ur aunt mite not make it, don't tell them. If it seems like she will be ok, then I would tell them. I know this sounds kinda messed up but if thinking about ur aunt would (hopefully) make them stress about you less. I know later they will stress/think about you being gay but maybe it's the rite time so They will kinda be distracted. Maybe I'm wrong for thinking this. Remember this is just IMHO.
     
  7. BrownBoi89

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    Thanks to everyone who took the time to post. I haven't been on here in forever, due to papers to write and stuff, but I'm feeling a lot better. I mean I obviously won't feel completely better until I tell everyone but I'm usually able to find ways to distract myself from feelings of being closeted, which has been working good thus far. Haven't told anyone new yet, but it feels like everyday I am potentially getting there. My great aunt is still in the hospital, she has pneumonia, but since she's really old and it doesn't seem like she's getting better I don't think she will make it :icon_sad:
     
  8. TroubledRyan

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    good luck,and i hope your grandma does is ok