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So completely overwhelmed.

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Pasalacqua, Nov 16, 2009.

  1. Pasalacqua

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    I'm a senior in high school, and right around this time, I should be applying to colleges. Except I'm not. Well, I started one yesterday, and I got hit with the fact that, in a year, I don't know where the hell I'll be.
    I don't know what I'll be doing. I don't know if I'll be able to see my friends, or where they'll be. I don't know how I'll pay for it. I don't even know where I should apply to. Like, do any of the colleges I want to go to even want me.
    Why would they.
    There's nothing special about me that would make them want to take me.

    On top all of this, I'm completely unsure of my major now. I had a conversation with a friend and we got into how there aren't a whole lot of jobs for my major and how I'm not a very competitive person, and I completely agree with him. I'm not. And if there's only a few jobs here and there for my major, what are the chances of me getting it.

    I'm so fucking overwhelmed by all this college shit and graduation and just the fear of my future hanging over my head.
     
  2. RaRa

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    Ok, first thing you need to do is chillax. A lot of people don't know there majors until they're like 2 years into college. My brother changed his major like 2 times, and he's really smart and focused, and he seems to be doing fine. I'm sure you'll pick something that's right for you. There are tons of options and you should go for something you enjoy doing. You also don't need to worry so much about your future job right now. If I may ask, what is your major exactly that there is a shortage of jobs??

    Also, colleges do want you! How else are they going to run??? I know it's scary, but apply to as many as you can. You can be scared and apply or be scared and not apply, but guess which one lands you a greater chance of getting into college?

    Now go fill those apps. :slight_smile:
     
    #2 RaRa, Nov 16, 2009
    Last edited: Nov 16, 2009
  3. zzzero

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    well what's the major you want to pursue?

    You should atleast apply to colleges even if you dont think they'll take you. Surely if you've already chosen a major you enjoy whatever you've chosen, so you must have something to offer to someone! No one is useless and you shouldnt talk yourself down so much, just get those applications out there and you'll end up doing what you love or finding out what you love. I know plenty of people who went to school with no clue about what they wanted and found out and there were plenty who went and knew exactly what they wanted and now it's changed to something entirely different. So dont worry about majors or not having anything people want... they really just want money... plus, if you have any minority status in society, they'll want you... i might actually suggest writing your college essay about your sexuality considering it IS something that makes you a minority!
     
  4. zzzero

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    OH, and one more thing, you should really look at schools. Take it from me, I didnt look very hard the first time around and ended up wasting a year at a school i hated but now i'm transferred into a school i absolutely LOVE. SO dont waste a year due to just wanting to get it over.
     
  5. Pasalacqua

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    I want to go into fashion design.

    And yea, I know I need to calm the fuck down.
    But it's not happening.
     
  6. Pasalacqua

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    Oh yea, I just asked my father for help with the applications.
    He told me "If you can't even do the application, maybe you shouldn't be applying."
    Thanks.
     
  7. RaRa

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    Hmm. I don't really know that much about fashion design. Have you ever thought about double majoring? That way you can have a back up in case something happens.
     
  8. Pasalacqua

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    That thought actually never crossed my mind.
    I'll look into that.
     
  9. SpinachWrap

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    Filling out an college application is a skill that you will never use in college. The essay writing part is, but the actual deciphering of all those fields, and what to put where, that never comes up on any exam I've taken. Doing paperwork is an important skill, so you should probably start learning now, but learning doesn't mean knowing how.
     
  10. zzzero

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    I actually go to an art school and i know lot's of people in the fashion department. Most of them DO end up getting jobs after school, maybe not exactly what they want but you have to work your way up... you wont leave school as a famous designer or anything you just gotta build a reputation and contacts. network all you can. They teach you how to find work after college when you go to college so dont worry about no jobs being available, do what you love!
     
  11. Pasalacqua

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    What kind of jobs do they have, because that's really what I'm concerned about; finding something entry level. It doesn't seem like there's much there to me.
     
  12. Jim1454

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    It is completely understandable that you are feeling anxious right now about your future. There are so many uncertainties all of a sudden for you to contemplate. But you do need to contemplate them - and make some tough decisions.

    Why do you want to go into fashion design? Have you done that kind of work in high school? If not, then I would strongly recommend reaching out to someone in the industry. Your local newspaper would have a fashion writer who you could speak to. Or even people that work in high end retail would be knowledgable about the industry. Get a sense of what to expect from them.

    Read up on the different schools that you are considering. Yes - they'll want you to attend, assuming you will do well and you can pay for it.

    So practically speaking, figure out how you're going to pay for it. If you haven't talked to your parents about this, then you need to. Your dad isn't being very supportive, but perhaps he doesn't understand how nervous and uncertain you are. Perhaps he interpreted your request for help as laziness. So tell him how you're feeling and talk to him about what financial help, if any, he's going to provide you with. I would think that would have a big impact on where you can consider going.
     
  13. Chip

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    The experience you're having is something that the vast majority of high school juniors/seniors have. Very, very few people know in high school what they want to do, and of those who think they do, they usually change to something else during their college years.

    If you are really, seriously committed to fashion design, you want to look at a school that specializes in that. Fashion Institute of Design and Merchandising (FIDM) is one excellent school, and there are many others. But honestly, I think you would be much, much better off starting out at a regular college and exploring some different possibilities, because it seems like practically every gay boy I meet wants to major in fashion design, and almost all decide to change to something else for a variety of reasons.

    Also, since it sounds like you really don't have a strong idea of what you want to do, I would very highly recommend the excellent book "Now What?: The Young Person's Guide to Choosing the Perfect Career" which has some very practical advice and information on choosing your career.

    Not only do most people entering college not know what they want to do, but of those who graduate with a degree in a given subject, the vast majority are not working in that field 5 years later because they've found something that excites and fulfills them more. And with a handful of exceptions (business, fashion design, a few others come to mind), most undergrad degrees are not specializations anyway; the typical undergrad major only has about 30 credits (1 year) out of the 4 years worth of credits that are actually in the major specialization. It is in graduate school where most of the specialization occurs.
     
  14. malachite

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    whoa whoa whoa there cowboy. First of all slow down, take a breath. I felt this way when in my Senior year too, and it sucked!

    Everything in your life IS about to change, but believe me it will be for the better.

    Don't worry about your friends, because you're about to get a whole lotta new ones.
    Not doing any college apps will only make you stay in place and go no where.
    As for how to pay, well that is what loans and scholarships are for.

    You're not the only one freaking out about this, trust me, talk to some of your friends. They feel the same way you do.
     
  15. zzzero

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    there are always a number of entry level jobs for any line of work. You work as an intern under a designer or manufacturer and learn things about the buisness that you might not have learned in school then from there they offer you a position doing a specific job in their company. Not every internship will offer you a position beyond your internship but that's why many students take on a number of internships! Dont worry about getting a job after school, just worry about going to school, getting a degree and learning something you're really interested in. There will ALWAYS be jobs available no matter what people say or how the economy is. And for all we know, you're the next great designer of the 21st century, now as an art student myself, I can say I would be thoroughly disappointed if the world missed out on something great because a designer was stressed about college applications. I know it's hard but you've got more going for you than you think. Just write about how you're different from other students for as many reasons as you can, do your best in high school and really start to get involved in things you really enjoy because otherwise you just wont be happy!
     
  16. 71390S

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    Could you work with a tutor or school counselor to help you fill out the applications?
     
  17. Lexington

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    I'm probably repeating a few things that have been said before, but hey - wouldn't hurt to read them again. :slight_smile:

    There's this belief that people go into college knowing precisely what they want to major in, precisely what they want to do with their lives, and precisely how best to go about getting that precious knowledge out of the college during their two/four/whatever years they're there. And they know precisely how they'll pay for it, too.

    Not. Even. Close.

    Oh, I'm sure there are those people who knew at age four they were going to be...a doctor, say. So they scoped out the best pre-med schools starting at age 12, and applied for all the financial aid by age 16, and took all the SAT training courses so they could ace those, and and and... These people are WAY in the minority.

    Most us humans finish our high school days in a maze of question marks. What do we want to do? Where should we go? And how the hell are we going to pay for it? There's last-minute college picking and panicked SAT taking, and we end up walking onto a campus in the fall with one main thought in mind.

    "What the HELL am I doing here?"

    But then we take the introductory courses. And get a better grasp at what we're good at, and what we might like to try. And we might change our mind a few times, but once we find a path we think we can forge, we declare our major and head forward. And we take comfort in knowing that having the "wrong" major does not preclude us from finding something else we like later on. And in doing well in that field.

    My friend A majored in biology. He's a senior editor at a major magazine.
    P majored in science and technology. He writes music for TV shows.
    M did pre-med. She's a bio-ethicist.
    D majored in film studies. He's a massage therapist.
    I majored in math. I do nothing but the slightest hint of math stuff in my work.
    J was pre-med. He's a doctor.

    ...OK, he's one of those weird guys I mentioned earlier. :slight_smile:

    >>>There's nothing special about me that would make them want to take me.

    I wouldn't deign to give numbers, but the vast majority of people who want to go to college end up going to college. Apparently, you don't have to be all THAT special. :slight_smile:

    Lex
     
  18. Idunnohereitis

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    well what do you wana do.

    art careers- very competitive everybody thinks they can do it. unless ur career is in multimeadia advertising / recording /film /photography/ or identity logo design and promotions an art career will be very difficult...possibly consider them as side interests and careers. minors for college. --apply to Pratt WMP there are a tone of sights to help for colllege prep. www.careercrusing.com is a goood one. my GC makes me use it.

    Law-eassy to get into an law enforcement career, harder to acheive recognition and rank up and stuff, difficult with the relationship thing to
    paraleagals- easy to start--- rewarding but sometimes painstaking and slow
    lawyers---lol lots of school lots of comp and you get what you put into it (sounds like a bad idea for you)

    Health /med

    emt-paramedic get paid a lot very rewarding and fast paced and importatn
    DR- long schooling/fun rewarding but you like it or not kinda thing
    Dental hygenists/ or assistant rewarding and lots of money not too appealing

    rescue -thrill rewarding not too much recognition

    _architecture/interior/exterior design is artistic and design related 4 year schooling at least, competitive to an extent but if you have good work from college then itll be easy

    auto design-like it or not
    mechanics- hardwork like it or not.


    lots of choices. but you gota be happy with what you are doing in order to feel successful. ya dig?
    good luck. message me if you want more help. i actually know a lot aobut this stuff


    hey counseling is a good career especially a school counselor yearly raises and lots of vacation 3months paid. good stuuf. nto toooo hard.

    Good luck. Happy Holidays