There's not much point making this an anonymous post... i was going to, but whatever. I was at a sexual health clinic today and was having some blood drawn for a test. The dude doing the syringe work was just a short little bald guy, seemed friendly enough. So i had my arm out, he tested my vein, and then said to straighten my arm out along the arm of the chair. I did so and within a short time noticed that he'd positioned his crotch right in front of my open hand. I only noticed because the tip of my fingers actually touched his pants lightly, so i closed my fingers. anyways, i have to look away while blood is being drawn, so i did that, and soon felt the ever-so-light touch of the front of his trousers on my knuckles as he was doing the drawing (it was very very light, feather touch at best). After that, when he was putting the bandaid on the needle puncture he ran his hand down my forearm down to my wrist/hand for no apparent reason when taking his hand away. I get the distinct impression he did this on purpose. If he hadn't done the hand thing i would have dismissed it as a coincidence/accident. I need to go back to the same clinic within in a week and i don't know whether or not i should make a complaint.
well if your really certain what he did was intentional, you should probably complain. however if part of you thinks it might have just been coincidence, then just go back and see if he does anything else this time. if he does than you should make a complaint.
no offence, but that's bad advice... i don't want to see the same guy again. At all. I'm thinking i will speak to the counselor at the clinic before deciding. I'm also thinking if i do make a report, and it's the only time it ever happens, then it's just a co-incidence and he won't get fired or anything over it. But if it's not coincidence... then he's a scumbag.
Whether or not it was co incidence or meant, it made you feel uncomfortable. i would definitely ask to be seen by another person, and maybe even meant the person that I wouldn't want to see by Name (I take it that they wear Name badges and you saw). That way rather than having to make a full on complaint, the correct people will be aware of a problem with the said individual. That said what he did after he put the plaster on is enough for me to feel it was inappropriate and I would mention that. Either way definitely request a different person next time..
you're right i'm sorry, i was just trying to imply that he looked innocuous... just your everyday normal-seeming nurse/doctor (i'm not sure which)... for some reason short guys strike me as friendlier in general.
No worries, no real offence taken on my behalf. Just made me wonder with your initial wording whether it would have been a different story if the guy was tall dark and handsome, and you enjoyed the flirting. In either case though, its certainly innapropriate for someone in such a position to be behaving as such. You're certainly within your rights to report it, or certainly ask for someone else next time you go.
he wasn't a bad looking guy. but even if he had have been beautiful, it would not have been on. Male or female, hot or not... not on... i need control over my personal space.
I would say report him. Even if it was unintentional, it is not professional and he should be warned so he doesn't put other people ill at ease. Say that you aren't sure whether it was intentional in the report too, I mean, he just needs to be warned. And also say that you're not comfortable with him in the future.
I PERSONALLY would let it slide. The few times something like this has happened, I've usually found something smart-assy to say. "Is this part of the new blood-drawing technique? Can't say as I'm a fan." Lex
thanks, but i think i've decided to report it. i'm not capable of so nonchalant a reply, i just froze up and wanted out of the room asap. the best and most succinct description i have heard so far is... 1 - if it was an accident, he needs to know what he is doing and that it can make people uncomfortable 2 - if it WASN'T an accident, then his superiors need to know that he is abusing his position of trust.
In any case, I would agree it's inappropriate. However, there are also cultural norms at work here. When I was involved with Mexican hospitals, the nurses would often offer subtle things (touching someone's hair, running their hand down someone's arm, etc) as a way of calming the person, and in that culture, it is both normal and accepted (a lot more touch in most latin american countries than in the US, for example.) And there are other cultures where similar forms of touch are acceptable. If the person is not of your native culture then it is possible he doesn't realize that it's inappropriate, and so you should still report it, but consider that this may be the motivation behind it, rather than something more nefarious. On the other hand, if he is a native Australian (or American), then it was almost certainly an inappropriately flirtatious act and definitely should be reported. It always floors me how tacky and inappropriate some people can be, even when people are at their most vulnerable, and those people deserve a strong rebuke.
was there again today, told a supervising doctor the specifics, and now feel irrationally guilty about the whole thing, but logically i know it was the right thing to do. they're going to have a short chat with the guy without mentioning specific incidents, and then keep an eye on him.
Yeah, I understand that you're uncomfortable, but I would NOT jump to conclusions on these types of situations... Though maybe it seemed a little out of place, if it were merely a coincidence, you could get that guy fired just for saying he was doing things that made you feel uncomfortable... doctors and nurses can easily lose their license if something were to happen and they went to court over something like this...
I don't see how inappropriate touching can be a "coincidence." Yes, it's possible that his intention wasn't to be inappropriate, but from the way it was described, and absent any cultural explanations to account for it, it's hard to come up with another explanation that's plausible. And many people are very reluctant to report this sort of behavior, which is why people continue to perpetrate it. It's also unlikely that a professional would lose a license over an event like this. They may be investigated and have a reprimand on their licensing record, but very, very unlikely they would lose their license.
