So I went on this choir trip. On the choir trip, I was planning to come out to my director who I am very close to and have known since 4th grade. However, she was very busy and I could never find time to sit down and tell her. But i was in a mood to come out (if that is possible). I had many gay, lesbian, and gay findly people on the trip so I ended up telling a lot of them to the point where just as many people in this choir know i am bi as the number of people I had told at school. My parents were not on this trip. However, my mom is normally in the choir. and now that much of the choir knows I am afraid she will just find out through the grapevine. plus it just isn't fun to come out to a ton of people and still have to hide who i am. so i decided i would tell my parents. BUT i am failing! I was going to tell them at dinner. it was just me and my parents, without my brother. but they messed up our order and my parents were in a rush and my plan was just destroyed. and now i am even more nervous if that is possible and I will have to tell them some other way. I don't know if i should just sit them down or if i should have my brother there or if i should just have one parent. and i need to find away to stop myself from backing out. any advice on how i should approach it. I am really determined to come out to them soon. tonight would be great. i just need to get myself to accually start the convo.
"Mom, I'm bi. Okay, what's for dinner?" You don't have to give a speech. When I come out to my parents, I'm going to say, "Hey, can my boyfriend come over for dinner?" Just something simple. "Mom, I'm bi" Good Luck, hope it goes well
I don't really know how to come out to them,but I think you should still tell your brother as well,or you would still have to hide yourself. Let's say you get a girlfriend,it would be very hard to be with her without telling him
I came out to most of my family over the summer... I never really wanted to tell my dad, but knew I had too. I had no idea how I was going to do it. I finally said ok, I'm going to tell him and then kept backing down. I hadn't had trouble telling one up until this point, and I had come out to many people.... I finally wrote a small letter, sat down in front of him while he was watching TV, and said I have to read you something. That was that... I spent so much time worrying about what turned out to be such a small moment. This was last week, it hasn't really come up, and it's not awkward! I love it! Just do it, you will be glad you did!
Thanks, guys. Just like gurds, I haven't really had an issue coming out to anyone yet. But I am just do freaked out about telling them. I would just do it tonight, but now my dad is out of town. I am mad though b/c I mentally prepared myself to do this and now my plan is messed up. I might just tell my brother and mom at dinner tonight. I probably should wait until everyone is home but I really just need to do this now. Uhmf. I am torn.
I am cursing ever watching snl's church lady. I keep having "so madonna... do you like tacos, or do you like weiners" pop into my head about this. Congrads on coming out to alot of people. Hopefully they wont spread it around, since it is still your thing to share. I was freaked out about telling my parents. they were the first people in my family to find out. But they generally accepted it gracefully. They questioned alot at first, but they loved me enough to accept me. once I told my mom, I felt this incredible weight lifted off my shoulders.
Yes, you really should come out to your parents ASAP. Your mom is probably going to be somewhat disappointed that the whole choir knows and she doesn't. She's going to feel like you don't trust her. Have you thought about writing them a letter instead of doing it face to face? Maybe that would be easier for you.
I do feel bad that so many people know before she does, but it just sort of spread a lot on the trip and in some ways it was good b/c it gave me this wonderful support group of really accepting people and without them I would have decided that I should tell my parents yet. I hope she won't be too upset. I hand't though about that, I just thought about how wonderful it felt to be open about myself. Now I feel sort of bad.
Oh and thanks for the advice Becky. I have thought about the writing thing, but I would rather just talk. I feel like it will be a fairly casual convo (hopefully) and I think a prewriiten speech might make it more awkward ( with my fam). But maybe I will right out so dome basic notes, just to prepare for anything they through at me.
I told my mom! It is was stressful, but she took it pretty well. Yay. I will put the details in the coming out section tomorrow. Right now I just need to take a deep breath and get a good night's sleep. Thanks for advice and words of encouragement!
