I had a humongous crush on my roommate for the longest time. And I guess, recently, for various reasons I thought i liked him more than i really did. After several months of not knowing if he really was straight, he told me that he had met a girl and that they started dating recently. At first i was like "SAY WHAT?" then I was angry and sad and hurt and then okay. For some reason, i ended up feeling more content that they were together--his "girlfriend" and I actually get along great. I'd like to think that I reasoned that I would never be able to have him anyways and that I should just stick with being his friend. Just eliminating him as a possibility. Am i in denial? That's what Im scared of, but I have begun to notice other guys (not that they notice me :icon_sad but life goes on. :icon_bigg . This is a big change, and it actually is almost stress relieving that this happened. I feel happier.
Hi there! Strong crushes on or attractions to someone, and even though knowing that nothing will ever happen, or the chances of that are low, can still provoke emotions within us for some time to come. In some ways, and although you knew that nothing would come of it, your were brought face to face with that reality. And maybe it is not such a bad thing because this probably more than anything allowed you to turn the page even further. You said a couple of important things that indicate that you have started the process of moving on: "I should stick with being his friend" "begun to notice other guys" "life goes on" "big change" "stress relieving" If you ever find yourself doubting again, just think about these phrases. The most important one being: life goes on. You will find someone with whom it will work out. I'm glad though that you ended your post with feeling happier. I think you are going about it in the right way. (*hug*)
Sometimes, when living really close together, feelings of love can be quite strong! Crushes can feed on themselves untill they become very intense... And every crush always feels as if its the only one you'll ever have again. Suddenly abandoning it might even seem like betraying your crush. But it's really nothing bad. It's just the way emotions work. I don't think you're in denial of anything, really. You just discovered that you really like him enough that his happyness makes you happy too. That's a good thing, and nothing to be scared of! It's good that you're moving on so quickly.
It doesn't sound to me like you're in denial at all, more that you're moving in the right direction and starting to heal. It's always rough when people we're interested in turn out to not feel the same way, but moving on is the best thing to do in that kind of situation, and it sounds like that's what you're doing. It's a lot healthier to do what you are than to dwell on him for ages, so keep it up
sounds healthy to me. straight crushes become much easier to get over once you realize that they're not possible. and they get easier to avoid in the first place as well. and if you are in denial, you've got us to counsel you when you do have a problem and we're always happy to
