Did coming out as gay change how close you were with your male friends?

A bit tough to say. I came out just as I was graduating from college, so I ended up moving away from them. The distance obviously changed the relationship, so it's hard to say what was due to that and what was due to me coming out. Since I'm still quite good friends with most of them, I'd say most of it was due to distance, and that my coming out changed the relationships very little.

Lex

 

How long has it been since you came out to that male friend? If it's been fairly recent, then perhaps he just needs some time to process it. As much as we know it's not a big deal, it sometimes changes people's perception of you.

Of course, as you said, it's quite possible that it's your own mental barrier that's making you feel this way. Whether that's true or not, just be patient and continue to be his friend. He'll come around eventually (but if he doesn't, then it's probably a sign that you're better off without him as a friend). Good luck.

Edit: In answer to your actual question, I only really came out to one of my male friends (I never had many). He was totally fine with it. Our friendship did disintegrate, but it was because of things I did, not because he was uncomfortable with it. And I'm in college now, where nobody really cares.

 

well ive only come out to one straight friend...as i only have one ...such is life..

but to begin with things were awkward seeing as i came out before knowing about pansexuals i was jsut like i like guys but girls are ok too its all about emotion.... and he was very homophobic up until the last couple of months and i dunno when but he jsut seemsto of accepted me better now and is actually become very effeminate around me...i think i give off an aura of camp giddyness to him that entoxicates.... so in the long run its made us much closer.

it all depends ont eh person and their abbility to adapt and be open minded and also how strong your friendship is and how much they value and cherish you, as some will know ive talked too he was very homophobic bsicially saying sick and wrong...but then said eh would accept me :S ....but now he just doesent care im the same old weirdo ive allways been

 

The only thing it changed for me is that the ones who had asked me about hot girls previously now ask me what guys I think are hot. Other than that, everything is the same. My most recent reaction from a straight guy: "thanks, good to know! by the way, we are having a birthday dinner tomorrow night...."

 

It did change for a few, for the most part no, there is still one good friend I haven't told yet though. Most of the friends I have are used to being around the gays though.

 

Well I've never really had males as friends, but most of my boyfriends' friends are guys and he says they all took it really well mostly. There's only one who's awkward by it, he says he doesn't care but you can tell it kind of weirds him out a little. So if they're really your friends they'll be alright with it.

 

It changed the way some of my male friends were yes because some people will just never be able to accept it. I dont know how old you are but if you are young then I can understand wit lack of maturity and stuff but yea there will always be a few

Fox

 

I think some of them are even closer (Not in either sexual or romantic ways)
After coming out, most of them sort of know me better; they seem to be more comfortable with me as well... Which sort of breaks the general reaction stereotype...

 

When I came out to my two best friends it did make it awkward between us, I don't think any of us knew how to react anymore... and later on one did admit they had trouble dealing with it, although to be fair I wasn't particularly comfortable with talking about it, I think they realised this which is why they almost acted as if nothing was different.

But time has passed and things are now great. They ask me about my boyfriend and being gay, we can chat quite openly and we seem closer than ever.

 

I get the feeling this is directed at bio guys. Oh well, you didn't specify.

Most guys don't care, and usually just treat me like any of the other guys...Though, no one gets pronouns right. Sucks, but I'm not going to push the issue right now.


Female friends on the other hand... That gets awkward occasionally.

 

Opposite gender dynamic here, but most of my female friends and I drifted apart after I came out. The friendships weren't especially strong and I think it would have happened sooner rather than later anyway, but I do think it had an impact. With the friends I had who weren't part of that group, though, they mostly took it fine, so I think it was more about those specific friendships than friendship in general.

 

Just before winter break started and while I was still at school I came out to my best buds from back home. Their responses were great, and upon coming back home it feels like we're stronger friends for it. One thing though is that I spent a lot of time coming to grips with being gay and was accepting of myself when I came out to them. I'm fine when we're hanging out and my orientation comes out somehow, whether it be in random conversation, questions, or an accidental word slip. They're all great about it though, and I don't think it's awkward for them because I don't let it be awkward for me.

 

When my straight guy friends found out that I was bisexual, it changed a lot of things in our relationships. They always want to ask me about sexual things, even though I'm a virgin. Not to mention asking me about the same gender being 'hot' or 'is she/he hotter then him/her?' thins and ect.

It's kind of annoying, but they're still the same old friends I've always had when they aren't bugging me about bisexual-stuff :3

 

It changed with some friends. Most of them were fine with it. Others stopped talking to me. And others were fine with it but thought I was making passes at them.