ugh! why do I always push the envelope with my friends

I know exactly how u feel, sometimes i wake up hugging my pillow

But he could probably be in shock, maybe he's trying to make up his mind and it keeps , changing when u guys go to bed, probably due 2 the fact that he's being cuddled by another guy in a bed. If that's not the case then i'll hav to rethink

 

I agree with above post.

My solution, come cuddle with me. I love being cuddled!

 

maybe because when your cuddling with friends around there isnt the chance anyone would think you two are doing anything or the fact that there is more of a connection, but when your cuddling in bed that is a more intimate spot and maybe he doesnt fell comfortable letting you into that intimate place, and as most guys go... we get hard ons when were in bed whether they are purposely there or involuntary they do arise and maybe he doesnt want to take the chance of feeling your penis rise against his ass... just be greatful that you have understanding friends and that you guys are comfortable around each other, but remember there are boundaries... i am learning that the hard way...

 

maybe there wasnt enough room in the bed for him to sleep comfortably? 3 guys to one bed sounds like alot and i know if it was me i would ave moved to teh floor.

a person needs space to move when sleeping.

 

Yeah It could be that he just doesn't sleep well with someone cuddling him. I know that I cant sleep if i have someone wrapped around me. Three people on a bed, i'd probably sleep on the floor too.

 

I'm right there with bluecat

just be thankful you have friends that are as open as they are

 

I'm gay, and I don't like sleeping (not sex) with the guy I'm seeing because I sleep like shit if I can't get comfortable and that's really tough with someone against you. Don't take it personally, take cues from his awake and conscious state that he doesn't mind :icon_wink

 

I think there's a big difference between cuddling with someone when the two of you are awake and cuddling with someone while sleeping. Apart from the whole overheating/comfort/room issues, it just seems a heck of a lot more intimate, and so it might just be that.

I just think it's pretty unbelievable you have 1, let alone 2, guy friends who are okay cuddling with you. That doesn't sound too standard (to me at least).

As for why you find yourself constantly pushing the envelope--well, it's one thing to know something with your head and it's totally another to understand it in your heart. If you're young and gay and single and haven't had a lot of romantic experiences, it's totally normal that you'd crave physical affection. I think a ton of people crave it, probably a lot more than we let on or even realise. It's also, I figure, harder for guys because most guys are not by default physically affectionate (especially with other guys) so it's just obviously going to be more of an issue for guys than girls.

What you have to do is try not to beat yourself up over it. Talk to yourself in your head, remind yourself that their rejection of cuddling you in bed is not a rejection of you, remind yourself you're lucky to have cuddly guy friends, and remind yourself that it's okay to feel the need for human contact but you're not always going to get as much as you want, and it's not because you're not worthy of it or because no one wants to give it to you... it's just not something you can depend on 24/7. But more than anything, it's okay to want it. But try to see that there's a difference between it being okay for you to want it and pushing others for it.

Hope that helps.

 

ditto (&&&)(!)

 

it sounds like you asking for too much on your friends behalf. he's only a friend. Be respectful and humble. Think about it, Their UNDERSTANDING ... not WILLING.

when moments like this happen, just stop and breathe for like a minute or two. clear your thoughts out. When those moments come, you let your feelings get the best of you. You shouldn't be thinking that this one night maybe just change your life forever because your friend accidentally touched your ass while you guys were sleeping. i know that didnt happen but im just making up a scenario. lol

Just chill and enjoy the fact that you have friends who comfortable with themselves and comfortable around you. in fact i'm a little jealous. lol

Hoped i help.

 

I have only come out to my boyfrnd today and he is takingit very goog

Dont think about it to much,Be happy they accept you for who you are

Maxi

 

^ while your advice is appreciated guys, just try and make a note to look at the date of the posts - the OP posted this 2 years ago, and likely doesn't need the advice anymore.

 

Sorry i am still new

 

Since this happens pretty often, wouldn't it be easier for you guys to just lock threads that are older than X months/years old or haven't been active in a while?

Would be better than scaring people off who don't know any better.

 

As far as I understand it, locked threads end up getting deleted or can't be searched after some time or something. I can't remember specifically what, but we like to leave old threads because they can be a good resource for some people in similar situations, but locking them removes that purpose.