I thought I was ready, but I feel like I might be losing it.

First of all: (*hug*)(*hug*)(*hug*)
Being in the stage just before coming out is not always the nicest feeling to have. To put it in a clichéd way, though: the night seems blackest just before the new day dawns!
Even if it takes some more weeks to come out, just think of how short a time that is compared to the road you already traveled.

To continue the runner analogy: sometimes you do find yourself running alone for a while, and it might make you think you're running alone, but then you turn a corner and find out your team wasn't gone, but you just couldn't see them for a time.

I think coming out can definitely help in being less lonely. When you're in the closet (even if the door is partially open to one or two people), it's hard to notice just how many mental blocks are keeping you from being open to people. In my case, I found out that my friends really were more awesome than I thought they were, and that they really did like me for just being me. I just didn't allow myself to see it because subconsciously I was already bracing for rejection.

I'm now out ot all my friends, and I only lost one friend over it (in hindsight, I was already losing him, though. The coming-out was just a convenient excuse for him). However, in the end, the increased closeness to my other friends massively outweighs any negative reactions. And the ones who reacted hesitantly came around pretty quickly.
In the end, friends didn't become your friends because you're straight, so they're not likely to just drop you over being gay. Especially if they find out you were gay all along. It might take them some time to get used to it, but most people do realise it's just a facet of you they never saw before.

Coming out to your roommates seems like a really good idea. If they react well, then it's a good courage-builder. and if they don't, then you aren't stuck with them in the same room afterwards. If you already got along with them before, I doubt they will react badly, though.

Unfortunately, even the best of friendships sometimes fizzle out over time. There are several way around this. First of all, sometimes, if just running into each other doesn't seem to be happening, it is time to take the initiative yourself. If you don't run into people, then give them a call and arrange to meet over lunch, to go to a movie, or just go grab a coffee. In the past, I often felt like I was imposing on people by arranging meet-ups, but in the end, my friends really seemed to like having time scheduled to meet.

Another way is to make more friends. Are you in any social groups, or clubs? Having people with a shared hobby to socialise with does wonders for making new friends. If there is a GLBT group in your campus, it might be good to look into that as well. It's always a bit stressful to go the first time, but you never know what kinds of people you might run into there. There's bound to be one or two that you could form a friendship with!

I wish I could offer more help, but it seems that you already know what your plan is, and it seems like a pretty good one. All that's left is to move past the anxiety and go through with it. If it helps to write about it, you can always count on my virtual shoulder to cry on!
(*hug*)

 

This is a really tough one. I am not sure that I am the best person to be responding anyway because I am going through a lot of the same thing. Having said that, you should perhaps change the way that you are looking at coming out.

At lease for me, the constant struggle is to remind myself that being gay is an unchangeable part of who I am. There is absolutely no getting around it. I can choose to tell people or not tell, but not telling people does not make me less gay. It does not fix the problem, it simply puts it off for another day.

Now, there is a lot to be said for putting the problem off for another day. Many people are scared of family reactions and have to move out first. Many people are not in gay friendly environments and feel like its best to wait. However reading what you wrote above, it seems that you are just scared. Perhaps you don't want to be thought of as gay. Perhaps you don't even want to be gay. Perhaps I am just projecting... hey you never know.

I guess my point is that if you remind yourself that you will never be straight. That this is an unchangeable part of who you are and that there is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING wrong with it, then it might be easier to take the step of telling someone. You are not making the decision to be gay... you are making the decision to acknowledge it. None of us asked for this, my friend. But each of us has to go through this process and it absolutely sucks. We are used to hiding certain parts of ourselves and it seems incredibly unnatural to talk about them... especially with the people who we care about.

I don't know if that's any help or not. But it's what goes through my mind when I feel like that.

 

In the wise words of Dr. Seuss "“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind". I know that doesn't help too much but really that's the only way of looking at it once you come out. Coming out in a sense is like a gamble, you never know how some one is going to react to it; for me, I also worried about losing friends and was terrified at the thought of being disowned by my family. However, I did not loose one single friend and my parents for the most part were very supportive and now that I came out every thing seems just the way it was before I came out except that I am openly gay.

It's perfectly fine to worry about losing people you care about, but in most cases if you are ready to come out you are only harming yourself by not coming out. It's a hard process but very worth it, good luck!

 

We all felt that overwhelming fear about coming out, at least I know I did.
Lex gave me some really good advice, which I'm going to paraphrase.

Your friends are friends with you, not with your sexual orientation. You the same person you have always been, just gay now.

Maybe you will loose from friends, but it that pain will g away as you get new ones, the pain of keeping all this fear bottled up inside you will never go away until you do come out.

Simply put, you can see where you are now and you can see where you want to be, but there is this gap you have to jump to get there and you're not sure what is in that area. The unknown freaks everyone out, so don't feel alone here.

Good Luck out there.