1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

time for 1 half of the parents to know

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by horizon, Sep 30, 2005.

  1. horizon

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Sep 18, 2005
    Messages:
    10
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    uk
    Ok so my mom and her new husband have gotten back off their honeymoon, im going up to see them in a few days, nest week sometime. I am going to be coming out to my sisters when i see them while i am up there, i know they will be fine with it and no problems there, i am also sure of the same thing with my mom. The problem comes with her new husband, him and his whole family are really homophobic (apart from my new step-sister, well her step-brother from her moms remarriage is gay to), and i left home when i was 15 because he used to get a bit violent. Letting my imideiate family is not a problem, but the step part of the family is gonna be a huge problem and i dont have a clue how to handle it. If i should talk to them or leave it to my mom to let them know
    They are the only people i know will take it bad, and im not sure how thats gonna effect me seeing my mom, as i dont really get on with her new other half so we dont see much of each other anyway.

    If u can make out what i was trying to write there can u let me know?

    any advice is greatly appreciated
     
  2. drhladnjak

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2005
    Messages:
    46
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Carrboro, NC
    First, try to take things one step at a time. Worry about telling your sisters and your mother and then see what happens. There's nothing that says you have to tell everybody right away and the only right time schedule is the one that's right for you. Plus, even if you think your mom will be totally ok with it, she may still need some time to process it all. Telling your step family and extended family can come later.

    That said, you should be prepared for your secret to get out to your step family. Whether or not you ask your mother and sisters to keep it a secret, there's always a chance they will tell others. How high that chance is depends on them and you can probably estimate that better than anybody. I'm just saying you might want to mentally prepare yourself for others finding out, especially your step father. It might not happen, but it's better to be prepared.
     
  3. joeyconnick

    joeyconnick Guest

    Joined:
    Apr 12, 2005
    Messages:
    3,069
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Toronto, ON
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    After your mother's had a chance to digest it, why don't you ask her how she thinks it's best to approach the matter with your step-father and his side of the family? I mean, she might not have an easy answer but she'll probably have a sense of how things might go down.