Hi, im 19 and i've always had a good life, i have a beautiful baby(i know im young) im skinny i look good (well at least my husband says so =D) and.. i have this friend, she's pretty great, we talk everyday she's at my job, me and my husband go out with her and her husband, she's beautiful.. we are very close and we always called eachother sweety and if we didnt see eachother for a day the day after we tell eachother how much we missed eachother and this one time she told me she had a sexual dream with me and that she likes me and wants to kiss me... ive had dreams with her also before she told me... alot of fantasies and one time i was in the bathroom at work and she gets in and lock the door and we kissed and it was the sweetest most passionate one ive ever had, and now we sneak eachother to the bathroom everyday (we work together) alot of times to do it and when we go out the four we also sneak out and do it and we love doing it and i cant stop thinking about her and i dunno wot to do! because i ADORE my husband, once we almost broke up and i was literally gonna die, i begged him to be with me, i cant live without him, and i have a perfect baby and i adore them... what do i do?!?!?!?!?!?!?
shoot. I'd get some counseling to help navigate the waters. you are so young, and obviously have a tremendous on the ball. I'm definitely more "seasoned" thank you, and my kids are much older than yours, but I've got the same struggles. Good luck, and stay with love! matt
It sounds to me like you're trying to have your cake and eat it too. If you're happily married and you love your husband and your family and you're just playing around on the side for the thrill of it, you may want to stop before it goes too much further, because it's your family that's going to get hurt in the end, and probably you too. If you really do suspect that you may be bisexual or homosexual, and it's important enough of a revelation in your life to come clean with it and accept a new you, then you'll have to deal with your family in a fair way, but you'll probably have to make big changes. There's nothing wrong at all with being bisexual, and there's nothing wrong with being heterosexual. The only thing I can't see is this scenario continuing without serious consequences down the road. Even if your husband is somehow into kinky stuff and doesn't mind "sharing" you with another, I can't see a 3-way being a healthy environment for your child to grow up in. By the way, it sounds like your husband is not aware of this. I hope you realize that you're betraying his trust if you continue on with this, and you're running the risk of this becoming cheating on him. Maybe it's not at that stage yet (I know that the "point of cheating" can be debated), but it sure sounds like it's heading there. Sorry if I'm going to sound blunt, but you have a family now and it means you'll have to take responsibility for your actions and anticipate their consequences.
thats quite the situation... u could just stop. ur married (please dont take that for granted. we dont) and have a kid. idk about u, but that counts as cheating in my book. and im sure your husband doesnt deserve that
You have several options. 1. Stay on the path you're on. Stay with your husband, keep seeing your friend on the side. 2. Decide which is more important - your husband, or your friend. Stick with that one, and stop seeing the other. 3. Talk to your husband. Tell him that you're (probably) bisexual, and you'd like to open up the relationship so you can enjoy your friend in addition to him. It's EXTREMELY tempting to choose 1. I mean, you get to enjoy both of them physically AND you don't have to confront your husband. Win-win, right? But of course, you know that this isn't a good option. Otherwise, you wouldn't have created an account on a messageboard with the user name "needsadvice", right? Because once your husband finds out, it probably won't be pretty. Option 2 is the one you're dreading. It means giving up one or the other, and you obviously enjoy and care deeply about both. Which is why I throw in option 3. No, it won't be easy. But consider - this way, there's at least the chance that you can have both. It might not be something he'll agree to. Or he might have a few (or many) conditions that he'll put on your "outside activities". (For instance, does HE get to see other people, too? Only fair, right?) Give it some thought. Lex
