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What should I do?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Chris145, Feb 23, 2010.

  1. Chris145

    Regular Member

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    Ok, so kind of stuck here.

    Basically, me and a group of friends went last year on holiday in summer, it was great and I really enjoyed it. Now a few months ago, they decided we should go again. Most thought this would be great but never actually discussed it for a while. Now a month ago, they decided we would go for 2 weeks instead of one. This would cost way too much and said I couldn't go, I wasn't even sure if I was going to go for just one week, a few of us from last year said they weren't.

    After a while they changed it back to 1 as most of us couldn't go. We had two rooms, one went and booked it straight away, without making sure everyone was going or even telling me the dates. The other group, which they seemed to put me in, even though I never said I was going, hasn't booked it. The travelling date, which they booked it on is my birthday, and tbh this definetly made my mind up that I didn't want to go.

    I'm not being shouted at by most of my friends. Because I've said I'm not going, and they said they can't find anyone else, its now supposedly my fault that they can't go. Facebook messages have been sent around them which I've found out about from friends, going on that the other room is cancelled because I'm not wanting to go. I even got a copy of one conversation, saying how they need to guilt trip me into going.

    Two of my friends have understood, saying it was the first groups fault for booking it so early without checking, or that you can't force someone who doesn't want to go to spend alot of money. There are a few things that really get to me. Firstly the fact that they seemed to just be going on at me, when other people had said a while back that they wouldn't want to go. Also, the fact that from messages sent, they seem to just need me, and not actually want me to go. From the sounds of it I'm sure they'd be fine with me paying the money and not actually going.

    I am in the wrong here, because I am truly confused at whats going on. I've thought about going, but thinking about it, the only reason I would really be doing that is so they could go, I actually don't want to go. If I don't go, I'm probably going to be hated for a long time, even if they do find someone else to go, and then over that week I'm going to feel so guilty because of this.

    Need some advice here :frowning2: Thanks
     
  2. Johnnieguy

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    You shouldn't need to go if you don't want to and you definitely should not need to pay if you don't go. It sounds like your friends made a lot of assumptions and now need to live with the consequences.
     
  3. Zumbro

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    The first group can call and cancel their arrangements. It happens all the time. There is usually no fee, although if you're going on a cruise or something there might be a small one. Either way, It's only February. They can easily call and cancel, and be completely refunded, although they probably haven't actually paid yet.
     
  4. csm123

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    Hi Chris
    When i read your post the first thing that came to my mind was, who needs friends who talk about guilt tripping you,on the net worse still.
    When you think about feeling guilty,just ask yourself,would they feel guilty if you run into debt so they could have their holiday??
    Good look and find a few new friends!