Today I was in uni and, oh my god...I saw a guy that was...HOT! He sat in front of me and...hell...All I wanted to do was to let my friends know how hot was this guy. But...oh yeah! I couldn't! Fantastic! :dry: I think this has been "the" detonator: I have to come out to a friend...I need it! I think the first person who should know is one guy, let's call it A. He was my table-neighbour in baccalaureate (it's the Google traduction for the 17-18 ages in institute ). We were good friends and, one day, he told me that was bi. In fact, he told me that he had just discovered it! I couldn't tell him that I was gay but our relationship went better anyways. We had very good moments. That makes me want to tell him first, because he opened his heart to me and I didn't. But...we have lost the relationship...I still have him on Facebook and MSN but the last time I tried to talk with him we had a "cold" conversation... I think if I tell him about my sexuality we will recover the lost contact, maybe not fully, but at least, I'll have one person who I can talk freely. My idea is to write him an email. I want to say a lot of things and the email seems to be the best idea. It will be a very heart-opened mail, so he can remember me and see for the first time the real guy who was behind the one he knew. That's all...Do you think it's a good idea? Something to count on? Advices, come to me, please! :lol: Thank you all!
well sending him a msn or email to mention to him you are gay is good. But perhaps its best not to mention first what you think about him. Just see how he reacts to you when you are gay. eventually you could say what you think about him.
Ops! Sorry, I'm not in love or anything with him. When I said that our relationship improved it was only in the friends context...nothing more sentimental The only thing I want is to let him know I'm gay, because he was sincere with me in the past and I didn't return the "favour".
I think you should email him I think you should include the reason why you didn't told him earlier (when he told you he is bi) and/ or why are you telling him now Just my opinion, I think you should open your heart ^^ Having a friend to talk to is really a great thing
Try it! From what you've said you should have every expectation that it will go well. Just the fact alone that he is bi should ensure that this goes smoothly. Your first outing should be to someone who will be supportive, and it sounds like he might be that person. E-mail is fine. I agree with AnneChaos, having a friend to confide in is priceless, especially when you can leverage that friendship to build up the strength to come out to the rest of the world. Let us know how it goes!
Thank you guys! From what you say, it seems a good idea, so I'll start writing the letter. I'll keep you updated!
Okay! I sent the mail two days ago...and I'm not getting response He has been connected on Messenger all these days and has updated his Facebook. He "must" have read the mail but I do not receive any reply I suppose the mail was sent, although it took more time than other mails I send with that account, but...well...what a coincidence if only this one wouldn't been sent! o.o Anyway...what I should do now? Maybe wait even more? Maybe ask him if he has received any letter from me? I'm so nervous...and I'm afraid of what he thinks about the mail :S Any suggestions?
Well, there could be several reasons why he doesn't reply. Maybe he really doesn't know what to write back, or how to react, or maybe he's just very slow at writing letters. Or maybe he doesn't know whether you'd be comfortable with him contacting you back again. Regardless, you can't know that without talking to him, so contacting him wouldn't hurt. Just start an MSN conversation and see how it goes from there. Don't be apologetic or act too nervous. Just say "Hey there! I was just wondering if you got that mail I sent you yet?". Maybe him seeing that you're open to talking about it will break the ice again. Worst case scenario is that the relationship has cooled, or he moved on with his life and isn't interested in a lot of communication anymore. That would be a pity, but you won't know that until you speak to him. And even if this leads nowhere, then I'd still want to give you my congratulations. You came out to someone, which is a great accomplishment, and can only help you to come out to other people.
Thanks Filip for the advice! I did it! He had not checked the mail in that account and when he read the letter he told me that was shocked! We talked a while and he said we must talk in person one day because we have a lot of things to talk about! He was so glad to know he's the first who knows the true, and I'm so glad on how fine he took the true! I'm so happy right now...it's a little step, but it's huge for me Thank you so much EC! It would be impossible without you! ^_^
Congrats! :eusa_clap That's a great first step! And glad to hear it rekindled the friendship! Just remember the good feeling, and you'll find that coming out to more and more people gets easier as time goes on.
