I feel very out of place in the world right now. I'm stuck somewhere and I don't know how to get out. I want to come out but then I don't know. I know I could very well live as a straight female for the rest of my life but at the same time it would be denying a piece of me. I'm worried that I'm wrong about everything including my sexual orientation. I hate my summer job(I literally stuck in the closet all day, I clean closets for my job), I want to move back home. I'm living in no where right now. I feel trapped and that there is no way out. I see everyone happy with relationships, jobs and other stuff. On top of it, I feel very cut off from friends and family. Sorry for my ramblings.
Feelings like yours suck big time while you're having them, but they do have a purpose. Sometimes you've gotta feel like you feel in order to motivate yourself enough to make a move. So let's sum up. You don't like where you are, and don't like your job. What DO you like? What would you like to be doing, realistically speaking? (As the saying goes, "winning the lottery" is not a financial plan.) You might not be EXACTLY sure about what you want to do, but what appeals to you? What do you find yourself thinking "yeah, I think I'd like that"? What sorts of things would you have to do in order to get into those jobs? Now, move outwards. What don't you like about your life, specifically? For instance, you said "I feel very cut off from friends and family". OK, cool - that's one thing. How can you alter that? A daily e-mail to a good friend? A nightly phone call home? A regularly scheduled get-together with either/or? And keep going. What else aren't you happy with? What might help? Some new clothes? A new hobby? Being more social? Exercise? If you'd like, you can try doing that on your own. Or, if you'd rather, you can lay it all out here, and we can knock our heads together and see if we can come up with some stuff that might help. Lex
