Soo ...

I know how you feel. I'm trying to come out as trans to everyone...and I'm having a hard time getting on with it. It's what I want...but I think some of the resistance I'm rubbing against is what's pulling me back. My mom....she won't even consider it. she's what is making this the most difficult because I feel like i can do nothing about it. and my support system is almost non-existent. The line your trying to cross is sooo vague that it is hard to get there. I think it is less of ohk everyone knows i'm gay right? and more completely accepting to yourself that you are gay and that is who you are. Nobody is ever going to change it and it's a big deal to finally be openly gay.

 

Oh yeah I see what your saying. It's kind of like hearing yourself say it right? Like I have no issues being trans but when I try to say it I choke on it.

 

lol the least...I don't quite understand why either because i'm completely comfy in who I am. But I just can't make it come out of my mouth.

 

I understand where you're coming from. The only thing that comfuses me is what you're trying to be when you're "out". Of course, we don't walk around in lives with huge labels on our foreheads that say "In the closet" or "out". What I mean to ask is, define your "out". Is it that you won't deny it if someone asks you? Or that you're going to be running around the hallways screaming your sexual preference? I'm "out" (in a way) to anyone who asks me. I won't deny it, but I personally don't see it as any of their business as to go about screaming it to unknown people.

Maybe what you're getting at (and that I might've realized just now) is that you'll be fine wearing Gay Pride clothing and articles, or perhaps holding a boy's hand as you walk to your next class? I don't mind being seen when I sport a rainbow wristband or belt at school, and I sure don't as hell mind when I'm with a boy I like and be seen holding his hand. But that doesn't mean my status as "out" is complete, either...

This calls for a thread...

 

So you're defining it as being fine and open about it. You just don't want to feel nervous. Interesting, because I personally see being nervous or embarassed as a reoccuring feeling you won't get rid of. It's just being self-conscious and aware of who's listening.

Right?

 

:O! I think I get it!

Lol, sorry, but the term "out" confused me (as the thread i started states).

So, what you want to feel is secure; not nervous, or embarassed, or self-conscious. If so, the only way to get over these is the fact you need to accept it within yourself, and love yourself for who you are; not what people think of you. Or, perhaps you try to conquer the feeling by telling people, and getting used to the feeling... XD

Am I closer? XD

 

Being "out" (still iffy on the usage of the word, there) doesn't necessarily mean you'll be friendly or not. Friendliness and lovability come into the aspect of personality. You don't need to be "out" to be friendly. Personally, I have many friends; a lot who don't know, either! It's not that I was "out", but rather that I'm outgoing and make friends outside of the point of being gay or "out".

So, you want to be friendlier by being out?...

 

And you're afriad of rejection; them turning on you because of you being gay.

Can you be out while wanting only certain people to know? Or does out mean you make the enemies and the friends? XD

 

Well, you don't want to pretend to be someone you're not. But if you see as telling the people you wouldn't want knowing as a threat, it could be a little more serious.

Are you worried about the physical-bullying or teasing?

 

In some cases, as a couple people have stated, you can be "out" by only telling the people you want! You don't have to tell them, but you also don't have to pretend to like girls! Be you! Be who you are! If it is inconsequently inevitable that you must tell them, then do so and face the the results. You're out when you feel that you've told all that you want to know. As for everyone else, who's business is it?