I was thinking my struggle with the "gay voice" has been going for the last 12 years on and off. I mean at times, it hasn't bothered me much, but for a great deal of the time it has. I take very in little of terms of medication, and have tried a lot of them through the years, but at those times, I was in a *TERRIBLE* state of "mind" now that I am doing better with therapy, I wonder if some of these meds could be more helpful. I think this is part ocd/party struggle with sexuality. I mean besides running, and a few other activies. I don't go out a whole lot, so I don't get out of my head much. Part of the reason, I don't go out much is because the thought of how my voice sounds plays over and over. I am just venting. I am frustrated, the thought it always "on" 12 years of the same thought. Its just upsetting. I have been having panic attacks lately as well. I feel like I deserve a break. Justin
wooah you had the voice for 12 years!!!??? i think i mite have it.. but its jus me talkin to myself ¬_¬ . i ignore it most of the time, but i think its just me thinking
I know how you feel. Not really with the voice (I don't know, or for that matter care if I have it really), but I am the same way with getting stuck inside my head. I dwell and obsess on things and it drives me insane. I feel like I'm hurting myself doing it. I get panic attacks, too. I'm not sure where I'm really going with this, but you're not alone. Keep venting - I don't get much chances to do it, myself, but when I do, it helps. Oh, and err, I don't think more SSRI's will make it go away. If you've been feeling better recently, you're probably on a good enough level. Hiking up the meds will probably not help much, if at all.
Its likely that you're voice sounds a lot worse to you than it does to anyone else. That's the same way for everyone! I don't think anyone likes the sound of their voice when they hear it played back to them on tape for example... If you're feeling better in general, take thanks in that! With a positive attitude towards life, I bet you'd find that you'd have a good time getting out and doing things with other people.
That is so true...I used to think i had the best singing voice, like i could sing really well, so i entered my schools version of Aussie Idol...Well i saw the tape of it and it turns out im not as good as i thought i was....let's just say i won't be entering any talent contests in the near future Also, just out of interest, what does ssri mean?
i know a little boy who has had the "gay voice" since he was five years old....i don't think he has really come to any realization yet but he is in middle school now and i think he receives quite a bit of ridicule for it
I don't think any increase in medications is going to be of help to you. That you are responding well to therapy and what you are taking at the moment is the goal and eventually you can stop the SSRI. All have side effects and are only a substitute for what your own brain can produce over time. It has been proven (much to the surprise of researchers) that the brain can physically change with therapy and adopting new life habits. Using MRI images while working with people that have obsessive compulsive disorder, as therapy with improvement progressed there were definite changes in the area of the brain (became larger) noted. The goal is to bring about permanent change, but as long as meds are used, it always will be a crutch. It takes a bit of effort to change attitude, how we think and feel about ourselves and how to respond to the world in general but it can be achieved. The medications are suppose to be only temporary to get over the really rough spots. As for the gay voice, there may be little that you can do except to be accepting of your attributes. Stereotype attributes have been proven wrong so many times in the past and unfortunately you can't change the world, but you can change your attitude concerning it and how you react or act towards it. Control those things that you can, accept those things you can't and try to keep balance will help. Keep doing what you are doing and be a bit more patient, I think all will turn out well for you. Congrats of your success so far.
Hey, thanks for the responses. Today I had a really good therapy session. I got to things I didn't thing I would get to. I guess what I learned today that I am really not as a big as a mess I am as I make myself out to be. I really like my therapist that I am seeing now. He is a big help, but he also cares a lot. I think one thing that has been really helpful lately is my running. I have increased it to an average of 35-40 miles a week. It is a lot, but I can see some of my other OCD symptoms decrease because of this. I guess I have to remember that I will have my ups and downs still. But not to get too discouraged when I get stuck in a bit of a "rutt" I think I should of retitle the thread "Maybe I need to relax?" I think isolation is a killer and has and still does make me depressed at times. I am often lonely, although I don't have to be.
