Hey everyone. So to start off this is not a post meant to offend anyone. Please do not take it directed at you because it isn't. This is just me ranting about how I feel. Basically I am first off, finally happy being single. The best thing I am able to tell myself is the fact that by being single, it will let ME pursue whatever I want out of life, in my case, to be an actor in the industry (movie/tv industry, not theatre not that anything's wrong with it as even it gives me experience with acting) but basically like I was saying...the best part about being single is the fact that it means I get to be my own person and no one is there necessarily grounding me to one place...well sides from my mother but that's another story . The thing I'm annoyed about however is my friend base where I live...not the city I go to school in 30 minutes away, but in my actual city/hometown. Everywhere I look people are getting engaged, or married. Not a day goes by that I don't get ANOTHER event invite on Facebook to the stag N do or BBQ or w/e for another one of my friends who is engaged. This just pisses me off because seriously most of these people are my age, or younger than me, or no older than 25. And while love is great and all, I'm happy for them in some ways, but to me I just can't help but think "YOU ARE GETTING MARRIED WHEN YOU'RE ONLY 22, ARE YOU ****ING CRAZY?" Like I said, while I believe love is great and all, there's a time for it, and that time is AFTER you've developed a stable job or profession for yourself, after you've done what I like to call "settled" your life. Where you're truly at the point where it doesn't matter if you get a partner or not, because you're at that point where you're ready to enter the next step. To me getting married under 25 is just TOO young. I mean look at the past, and I mean the 60s or 70s, when people were getting married at 18. It was all fine and dandy for them because the boy would work and the girl would be able to stay at home with kids. But now, now it's jut gotten to the point where we're returning to that stage, but unlike back then, the world has changed and so has the economy, in most cases (unless you're a doctor or high paying job), both people (whether male and female, male and male, or female and female) need to be able to have jobs to support their home. And how does one do that? To me it's quite simple, go to school, or trade school or some form of post-secondary education, get a degree, maybe do a Master's or something, and get into a Profession. THEN you can get married. But here in my city, it's like people are hopping on the marriage train just a short time after they have graduated from high school. I mean sure, maybe there are some people who are able to get their postgrad quite a short time after graduating and are making a good living for themselves, and that's great, but that's still a minority of people. The majority are still generally in school around this time, and frankly starting a family at this time is just too soon. What if you end up having a kid? Then what happens? Your post grad could be flushed down the tube, or you barely ever see the kid. In this city specifically, my worry is that the people getting married young, are going to wind up where? Flipping burgers at McDonald's for the rest of their days just to scrape by. Where will I be? I'll be in Hollywood, making a name for myself and then having a family when I meet the right guy. (and please don't tell me the whole "oh that's just a pipe dream" thing...I've heard it fifty times over from my mother thanks). Anyway, that was my rant. So to those of you who are single, especially if you're around my age, be happy you're single. You don't need someone to make you happy, and what's more, being single will allow you to be you, to make your life what you want it, and to not have to worry so much about supporting a family or anything like that. Yes, if someone presents himself to me, yeah I might wind up dating them, but don't think you'll see me going into a marriage anytime soon. Love may "make the world go round" but the fact is, the first thing you need to do is love yourself, then be able to support yourself, before you can EVER think about being able to love someone else. And also remember these wise words from RuPaul: "If you can't love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love someone else?" Love to all of you Sean/Revan
Re: So Annoyed Being a single guy who has desperately been seeking a boyfriend for the past year or so and who has felt lonely for far longer than that, your words were encouraging to me. Thanks.
I sometimes find that people from smaller towns tend to get married earlier. Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that they don't see as many opportunities for themselves in their smaller communities, and haven't really considered moving, and hence they decide to get married rather than thinking about their careers or educations. Of course, people in cities do this as well. There's nothing inherently wrong about getting married at a younger age - for some people, having children is their biggest priority, and if you want to have a lot of kids (four, five, or six), you have to start early. Those people will generally have to make sacrifices in order to achieve their dream of a large family - it will likely mean living more modestly and foregoing career opportunities. Anyways, as a single person who's 30, I've also seen some people who get married before they really considered it - it ended poorly. Others got married while still in university, and it's worked out great for them. I think what's important though is that you make the decision about getting married carefully - I don't believe marriage is something casual that should be cast aside without much thought or care. If you are going to make the commitment, you should consider it carefully, and make it fully intending that it last for the rest of your life. My two cents
Good point star. But the main point of my rant is to love yourself before even considering marriage. And I just feel, many of the people here in my city/town have done so...and as a result I just don't see many of their relationships ending well...
Really? Only two people even have comments on this?.... Why is it a majority of my topics wind up getting less than five responses...are they immature or something?
I have two friends who happen to be twins and they both just recently got married before they were 21. I couldn't believe it either....maybe it's just a small town thing like he said
