Not to make two posts about the same guy, but i'm in need of some advice here. So there's this guy who is a friend of a friend. He's gay, and very cute, and pretty nice. my friends been trying to hook us up for a while. I was with my friend and him on the 4th. We ended up hooking up. It was absolutely wonderful, and in the morning he came back and cuddled with me and I thought it went really really well. Well then I had a party on friday. First he said he didnt know if he was going to NY to visit a friend or coming to the party. Then he said he was coming, but he had to go home to change, saying he wish he had just brought a change of clothes because he works near where i live. Then he wanted our mutual friend to go with him so he didnt have to drive into the city alone, but our friend was already at my house. Then he said he was tired and though tthere might not be parking. I convinced him that there was parking and it would be worth it to come. He came, but he brought his, for a lack of a better word, "fag hag" friend with him (our friend calls her his wife, and not in a good way). So the party was going alright once he got there, but I didnt have a lot of time to just sit and chat because i had to keep getting things for people and fix things and make sure everyone was having fun. Then the cops came and kicked everyone out. He and his fag hag came back afterwards though with a few people and we were just hanging out, nothing to exciting, we didnt want the cop to come back. Then he and his fag hag left (which was unexpected because they had a hard time getting there and i figured he would want to stay) but he said it was nothing against me but they were gonna go home. So they left and i was REALLY really bummed, and super depressed the next morning because i was totally expecting him to stay. So I texted him saying sorry about the weird situation and asking if he got a ticket (which is common where i live and i said I'd pay for it if he got one) Then the next day, after our friend had cheered me up a bit, he texts me when he wakes up saying not to worry about the party and that he didnt get a ticket. I asked if they got home safely and he said yeah but not till 3 am, (they left around 2:10, so that's the right amount of time to get home). I told him well atleast he got to sleep in his own bed and he hasnt texted me since. I cant figure out if he is into me at all or not. I mean we hooked up that one time, and that was pretty good. I guess I could have done better, but I was drunk and it would have been understandable if it wasnt the best. I really like this guy, but when he's with his fag hag, he's really hard to read. I want something to work out with him but I dont know where to go from here. I dunno how much time I should give it before I text him back. I think I made it pretty clear that I like him. He's made me think he likes me in a number of ways but someitmes I get nervous taht he's just being nice or something. However he's never the one who contacts me first... Should I try making plans with him some night this week, or should I just drop it and move on? I dont want to miss an opportunity to do anything with him or have a relationship or even a good friendship but I really dont know what to do.
Why would you drop it? He's not said anything to you that says he's not interested in being friends if not more. Last time was just a night with some obstacles in the way (his friend, the cops, the distance) --not every situation ends up as we'd like. You should definitely try and see if he'd like to do something, maybe just the two of you. And don't get all paranoid about his lack of constant texting or that he does not initiate. Some people are like that (e.g., me), but it doesn't mean they are shutting you out.
Thanks! I just hate to be the person who gets on someone's nerves because I like to talk a lot. I get nervous when people dont contact me at all really becase I feel like it means i'm bothering them or something. And if he is like that (which i could see as he is a fairly quiet person) would i be seen as a bad thing if I text him or contact him more often than he contacts me? Some of my friends think I should wait for him to initiate conversation with me some time, but I get anxious and nervous that if I do nothing, he wont call or text or anything and then i'll miss out or something.... I dont mind being the one to initiate conversations and stuff, as long as I know i'm not being annoying to other people.
Well last night I was hanging out with my friend who had introduced us. As it turns out, he isnt really into me but he's highly non-confrontational and doesnt like to make things awkward or something i guess. He totally lead me on to believe that he might be interested in me.... but i guess it was in an effort to not make me feel bad. It's probably for the best as I already feel weird about it. Like he never really talked to me much afterwards, despite the way he acted when we hooked up. I do feel rather used though... Like if he wasnt interested and only wanted to hook up, he should have told me that to begin with... It's really too bad because he's really cute, but maybe he's just not really mature enough for me anyways. He seems to have a lot of self-esteem issues especially since he keeps his fag hag around despite the fact that she makes him feel bad about himself. My friend said that any guy that dates him ends up dating her too anyways because she's always there. I'd be cool with being friends with him but right now I dont feel like I could talk to him without making it weird.
