Now I feel like I can NEVER come out.

Aw that sucks big time. I don't even know what to say. Nothing as bad as that has happened to me, but similar, smaller scale things have occurred. There's been times I've felt almost comfortable with my sexuality, and nearly ready for telling someone and then someone I know (usually a close friend) will say something like "that's gay" or something. It can crush you inside, and force you deep into the closet again. My dad made a bad comment a few months ago too which hurt.....they don't even realise how much it affects you.

I would advise against telling your mum this now. Its obvious she's not going to take it well. You could possibly subtly bring the subject up now and again and try to debate with her without seeming too emotional/passionate on the subject, and maybe try to make her see sense. Most homophobia just stems from ignorance. But you could be in a worse situation if you came out to her, and she rejected you as a result. What about someone else, your sisters must be open minded, is it possible to speak with them about it? Or a close friend?

Don't rush to come out if you doubt people will accept you, because you are - I assume - dependent on your mum this now, you don't want to risk that. It really sucks, I know, but I'd advise on not doing anything you might later regret. Be sure before you do anything. Hope things work out in the end

 

Pure bigoted propaganda is what your mother clearly has been reading or seeing. I don't even have to know her to know where she's getting that shit.

 

The whole pro-creation is the same debate that I have argued against. Whether to have children is a personal choice, the meaning of live is not only to reproduce. If that was the case then you can just donate semen and be freed from homophobia. But as you said, if we prosecute homosexuals because they can't reproduce then we might as well prosecute people with ovarian cancer, the disabled, priests, monks, nuns and the rest.

If your mother really loved you and know that what she said is hurtful towards you, then she should shut her mouth.

 

I'm sorry to hear about the entire situation, however I can understand what you mean about the above quote. When they just say such harsh and cruel things that hurt so badly and they don't even know it. They'll call a gay person a "faggot" or some other word and to them it's no big deal, they just laugh at them or make jokes about them, not knowing how horrible it is to hear that from someone we love and thought loved us. I don't know what I can say to make the situation any better, but you're not alone, all of us are here for you and understand exactly what you're going through. Here's an e-hug (&&&) (*hug*)

 

Exactly, what I got told last night.
:tears:
I see it as if they don't accept it fine. You know your right.

I would come out in your early 20's.

 

I really, really hate those situations. I think you should take as much time as you want before you tell anyone. Different people are affected differently by the amount of time spent keeping it a secret; some people feel more secure the longer they wait while others feel may feel more confined, and ultimately, you'll never really know until you do come out.

And I agree with everyone here. Some people unknowingly make comments that can totally destroy a person's life. (Literally and figuratively speaking). :icon_sad:

 

Well, most people don't fit the stereotypes; otherwise they wouldn't be stereotypes. I can sympathise with how unpleasant it is to be in this sort of situation, and having parents' who have seemingly contradictory opinions.
My half sister, who is estranged from the family revealed in a newspaper interview that she was gay (she was running for parliament in England, and was asked about marriage, but I guess that's another story). My dad seemed fine with it that she was gay, but when I happened to bring something up with him, and got to talking about people being gay he did the whole sort of "never be happy in life" thing. It's upsetting, but I have wondered whether that was a probing sort of thing; I had been leaving subtle hints about the place in some sort of effort to prepare them.
I hope you work through it; but try and remember how your mum feels in the situation she may feel she's in - in a sense she's in an albeit different closet through not knowing whether her suspicions are true, and feeling guilty for having them. I'd give it time, try and bring gay issues up subtly - don't push the issue (don't do what I did the other day and go to a Pride parade with a friend she knows to be gay ), and try and sound her out for her real feelings about it - I suspect you'd have realised if she was really as strong-feeling about it all as your conversation suggested.

 

This is where the radical libertarian view is useful
It would gross me out, but in an ideal world where everyone was nice and shiny, and I was a (nice) dictator (I could go into detail on that, but that's a whole other thing about my political beliefs) then I would say that if both the man and the girl consented and she genuinely understood all the stuff about it and wanted it, then yeah, I would let them get married, and throw up at the same time.
Unfortunately, the Earth isn't shiny, and there are two reasons for me, if I was a (still nice!) dictator not allowing that.
a) You wouldn't get a 6 year old fully understanding and wanting, and the man not being a total perv...and they wouldn't be in love
b) Even if you did, you couldn't legally differenciate between the pervy man and innocent girl and the couple that wanted it.
I would make the age of consent 14. But yeah. I just went off on several tangents, and I doubt you would want to even consider mentioning that sort of viewpoint to your mum.

^^^^^tl;dr
But, when it's applicable, the radical libertarian beliefs will often provide you with a nice get out clause, e.g. the right to free will etc

If you tell her that you're gay, she might reconsider.
She might not. But then, if she doesn't, in all honesty, you want her out of your life as soon as possible.
You about to start sixth form college? Like, is it a new school you're starting in September?
Good time to come out to people

 

That's harsh; I see where you're coming from, but being gay really isn't something you want to loose your mother over. Otherwise, I agree about the 6th form college thing - I wish I'd come out at the beginning of 6th form, even though it was part of the same school I'd been to before (felt very different though) instead I left it to three weeks before I left, and had chicken pox for 1 and a half of those That said, do it when it feels right, there's no point listening to my regrets.

 

I'm probably harsh because I have an extremely shit relationship with my mum lol

 

Sorry to hear that.

 

'Tis ok, I'm used to it

 

Bear in mind that that came from someone with shitty family, as fringe pointed out
So yeah don't just cut her out if she doesn't accept you right away lol