Depressed.

If it's not too much to ask, where are you from?
Yeah, it sucks, from lots of points of view, and most of us on EC have gone through the same sort of stage you're in now. Still, I'll try and help you look on the positives - you've come to accept yourself, which is a difficult process, and in many respects its the hardest part of coming out. Otherwise, you have my sympathies, and I'll happily talk more when I know a bit more about you.

 

Welcome to EC!

I honestly don't know how badly gays are treated in Belgrade. The fact that you know there are a lot out there indicates that they don't have it TOO horrible, but the fact that you're worried about the treatment they get indicates that it ain't too great, either.

Any chance you can aim for the future? Work on getting to a spot where you can move somewhere where gays are more welcome?

Lex

 

Yeah, that's rough. My grandparents are a lot like your parents, I suspect.
Still, welcome to EC. You've come to the right place. Whilst none of us are going to be able to give you a hug, I think you'll find it reassuring to know that there is a caring community here.
Still, I've always wanted to visit Eastern Europe, Belgrade sounds like quite an interesting place. I'm from Belfast which is in Northern Ireland. It's a pretty homophobic place too, but I've been lucky to go to a very liberal, tolerant school, and have supportive friends.

 

Your English is better than most Americans'.

Lex

 

That's a good plan. We have a saying here - "Eyes on the prize". Keep your sights set on the goal ahead, so you can have a better chance at living as a happy gay guy in the future.

Lex

 

Yep, your English is very good, I thought you might be from the UK or America before you said, and Lex is right it's better than most Americans'.
Yeah, I think that sounds like the best you can really make of it, I'm sorry you're in that situation, but there's not really a lot you can do about it right now.

 

Rayban - I am so glad you found this forum. I just joined today, but if I had a support group like this when I was 16 (I'm now 21), I think my journey would have been a lot easier. It shows that you are serious, and are reaching out for help from all avenues you can think of. Thank God for the internet.

I am sorry about how gays are represented by your parents. It is rough to hold a secret from them, I know. Coming out comes with time, to some, but sometimes the parents just "know", and it is accepted. Who know what it will be in your case. For the time being, though, you have support here. So, whenever you feel the need to talk, you will have friends who will understand.

For the time being, meditate on who you are. Don't worry about what other people think about homosexuality, just focus on your inner YOU. Breathe and listen to your heart. You know what the best thing for you is, and right now, all you can do is be true to yourself, inside. You have come out to yourself, and that's where you are on your path right now. As time moves on, so will your life, and maybe, one day, you can show your true self to the ones you love, and be accepted.

Thank you for reaching out!

-Brandon

 

^ And welcome to you, BB.

Lex

 

You can say that again, I spend my holiday's in Donegal and it's SO homophobic!

As for your parent's well you do get parent's like that, if you came out would they be willing to read PFLAG material?

 

Donegal, really? I'd tend to assume they'd be much more laid back...

 

No lol, while I was there last month in the Irish Independent there was an article stating about the film 'Prayers for Bobby' and it was on in Dublin Cinema and that was the topic for dinner and it was just putting down gays.

 

:O It's a great film too. The next president of the republic could be gay though - there's a (quite brilliant) senator called David Norris who is going to run for it. He gave a talk at an MUN conference I was chairing at. Sort of person I'd like to be in 40 years' time.

 

Hi there! (*hug*)

I feel for you, I was raised in a bigoted right-wing family proud of their Herzegovinian heritage. A load of bollocks, yes. But, to tell you the truth, I always perceived Serbia as more homophobic than this place (see location) :\

There's loads of people who don't come out to their parents, especially not at this age with the financial dependence. It sucks, but there's not much choice when you don't know how your parents will react. Don't feel bad about your parents or other people, the most important thing is that you feel comfortable in your own skin.

Anyway, if you want to have a chat, let me know. I don't see a neighbor around often.

 

U HR su Rijeka i Zagreb najbolji sta se toga tice koliko sam skuzila, a u drugim gradovima nema bas neke scene niti se o tome prica.. Ljudi se najcesce prave glupi. Najveci problem u ovoj zemlji su jebena djeca koja crtaju svastike i ustasko u svugdje, a nemaju pojma sto to predstavlja... Sve to dolazi u paketu sa homofobijom, neobrazovanoscu itd.

Mozda imas nekog bliskog prijatelja/icu koji nije homofobican i koji ti moze pomoc. Zivot "u ormaru" je jako zamoran, ali cim se nekome outas stavljas sve na kocku.