I'm tired of my Dad belittling my depression!

You're not alone.
I'm feeling also that way right now.
But I'm thinking that it will be better later, and it calms me a bit down.

 

Well parent's seem to know best, does your Mum think your depressed?

 

It's tough for somebody who isn't depressed (and never has been) to actually comprehend what's going on with somebody who is. After all, we use the word in non-clinical ways, as well. "Man, am I depressed. My favorite team isn't going to the playoffs." And it's easy for them to picture somebody "depressed" as simply somebody being "in a funk". So they make suggestions that they would to somebody who actually IS in a funk. You know the routine - "look on the bright side", "snap out of it"...or "get a good night sleep" in this case. This might be especially true if they're on a "kids are overmedicated" kick.

About all you can do is try to do is to attempt to explain where you are, in terms he might be able to related to. "Dad, I've been in some 'funks' before. I've had bad days, and had nights where I didn't sleep well. And yeah, those aren't any fun, but I could handle those. This is something else entirely. At its worst, this thing totally consumes me. And not because 'I let it' - it simply washes over me and becomes frighteningly powerful. And trust me - I would LOVE to shake this thing off by 'looking at the bright side' or getting a good night sleep. But this thing is far too big for that. It'd be like trying to fix a broken spine with an ice pack. I'm not sure how to impress on you how deep this thing goes, but trust me, it goes a lot deeper than just having a bad night."

Lex

 

>>>And I hate when I here people say "I'm so depressed, I missed my favorite show" or something. It takes all of the meaning out of the word (If that makes any sense).

That's the way we talk, though. We love ramping things up for dramatic effect. "Let's get some lunch - I'm starving!" "That comedian was so funny, I was pissing my pants laughing." These usually from people who have never been anywhere near the "starving" realm, and presumably can keep their underwear dry during comedy shows.

And as far as your father goes, yeah, it'd be nice if he'd be more empathetic. But what I wrote was less a plea for some emotional bonding, and more an attempt to educate. "Here's what's really going on." I don't know if he'd be reachable from that direction, but you can always try. You might consider writing something out for him, but you'd have to work on keeping it unemotional. The point wouldn't be "I'm going through hell and you don't care". It'd be "you might not understand exactly what I'm going through, so let me try to explain."

Lex

 

My dad is kind of like that. He is just so damn smart and funny and knows everything!! Sometimes he's a real jerk about it too. What I do is be extra reasonable and not get emotional. It cools him down and he can't react all obnoxious without looking like a jerk so we usually are then able to have a level headed conversation. If you think about what you want to say to him about your depression and present it in a level headed manner as solid fact and not an opinion it's a bit harder for him to rebuttal. After that you can be all emotional if you choose

 

Does he know you're gay? Maybe he doesn't know the reason for you being depressed so he assume you're just a normal kid who thinks he's depressed for no reason.

 

I don't know about having the lowest self-esteem. I sometimes think if we harnessed all the self-esteem energy at EC, we could make toast. Lightly.

If your dad is a lost cause when it comes to this sort of thing, then just accept it. No use going to a dry well over and over again hoping THIS time tere'll be water. Stick with the places you DO get support.

Lex

 

I got horribly depressed 2 years ago and my parents pulled the same shit. My dad said I was faking it for attention. Parents have no idea.

You know your body and emotions best. If you are depressed you are and dont let anyone try to belittle the struggle you are going thru right now. I have been there and I understand how horrible it is. You are not alone.

You need to see a therapist or psychologist. While sometimes brought on by circumstance, depression is a medical issue and needs proper treatment.

 

Sounds like you should just stop talking to him about your issues then. He sounds like someone who is giving your more negativity with no positive help.

 

I definitely know what this is like. My father and yours have quite a lot in common. The only thing I can suggest is to not tell him about things like depression anymore. If he brings it up, try telling him that you don't want to talk about it. If your father is anything like mine he'll jump all over that, but the best you can do is just not react. As for methods of not letting him get under your skin.. I'm sorry, I haven't quite learned that myself yet. (*hug*) <-- if it's okay. I hope I helped a little!

 

The man who believes he is depressed and the man who doesn't are both right.