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Could use someone to talk to.

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Pasalacqua, Sep 1, 2010.

  1. Pasalacqua

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    I don't post here often, it always seems that I'll hang around the site for a while, then forget about it, and eventually find my way back here.

    Anyway.
    Today, my best friend for the past three years left for college. He's moving 5 hours away, and I'm not going to see him until November. I'm used to hanging out with him several times a week, and being able to talk to him whenever I need him, and just, going from seeing him almost everyday to a few times every couple months, it sucks.

    I'm sure a lot of you are/have gone through this too, and I know you're going to tell me, 'oh it gets easier and you'll still see him', etc. that's what everyone's been telling me, and I know that's true, but right now, it just doesn't feel like that.

    I hung out with him last night, when I dropped him off, we said goodbye. It was incredibly depressing. We both were sobbing by the time I had to leave and go home.

    He left this morning, and I've heard from him, he's there now. He seems pretty excited about it. I, on the other hand, have been on and off crying since I got home last night. I've barely left my bed today...:icon_sad:

    I really just want to get over it already, I'm sick of crying.
     
  2. seth381

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    I never went through it personally but my cousin did recently and I helped her through it And as a result we became good friends again why not try another close friend or a close family member to talk to ?
     
    #2 seth381, Sep 1, 2010
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 1, 2010
  3. Mirko

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    Hi there! (*hug*)

    I don't know if this will help but one of my best friends, with whom I live, was gone for two months and I must admit I needed a couple of weeks to get used to of not having him around. We talk everyday and do things together a few times during the week. What helped me is to remind myself that he'll be back and I continued spending time and talking to other friends.

    Even though you won't see him a few times every week for now, try to talk with him over MSN, Skype or call. Maybe ask him if you two could chat on the phone a couple of times during the week so that you still have contact with him and have the chance to talk to him in person. Going by what you have mentioned, I think he would probably love to do that.

    I know it is hard to face such a change because we get used to things and we start like them the way they are, and if a change comes, then we need time to adjust to it. And hey, it is okay to feel down for a bit. But remember that he will be back. In the meantime, keep spending time with your other friends and try to have regular contact with him.

    (*hug*)
     
  4. Danny19

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    hey i had that problem once. Just this August actually. One of my closest friends moved to Ohio. I miss her and wish she was here. but i know its for the best. I cried at the beginning, as she did too. Im sorry to say this because i know you are tired of hearing it, but honestly it does get easier. its been almost a month since i last saw her and im ok. We keep in touch a lot. Through facebook and texting, calling. I still really miss her, but she seems really happy and all i can do is be happy myself. She is coming to visit in December and Next summer. One thing that helped me get through this is that we planned that I would go visit. And since a few other cities are close to Ohio we plan on going, Like New York, Toronto, Boston, Chicago. Anyways the point is that it got me excited and i just wanna go already. Trust me, even though it is hard it definitely gets easier. Just give it time.
     
  5. silverhalo

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    Well the first thing I think you should understand is that EC is always here and anytime you need to talk to someone there is always someone online, so you will never be alone.
    Secondly I think you should cry a bit if you feel you need to, and then keep yourself busy. Try not to think about how sad it is that he is gone, but how lucky you are to have each other and how amazing your friendship is, it might just make you see things in a better way. I also agree as suggested above that you keep in contact with him via other means.

    I think in a way what makes this harder for you is that he has gone somewhere new and exciting and you are still in the same place, and its not that he is missing you any less but that he is busier experiencing new things and doesnt have familiarity around him to remind him you are not together, but I also believe that when one door closes another opens, dont worry im not saying your friendship is going to end here, but you might develope some other friends that you otherwise wouldnt have done.