Again, my mom is making my life a living hell.

My Dad is an acoholic too. Not just a normal alcoholic, but I mean losing multiple jobs and totaling every car we get. He's been to jail numerous times. I've been in similar situations, whether I'm in the car with him and he kicks me out in the middle of nowhere 'cause he's constantly drunk or he's throwing bottles at me. I try to distance myself from him. We can get along at times.

I feel like I have to save my Mom too. She is always in fucked up relationships. Her current boyfriend is married and a different religion.

You need to try and stay with your Dad. Seriously, Distance yourself from the situation. If someone wants to get better and beat addiction they have to want it themselves, you can't really do anything. Believe me, I understand in my own way what you're going through. Whether it was my Dad leaving me home alone for days at a time or my uncle overdosing and dying in a crackhouse, I understand addiction and feeling helpless.

 

I only heard ways that she is making her life a living hell. Sounds like you're making you're life one too by not letting her mess up on her own. You can't be responsible for babysitting your mom, dude.

 

>>>My dad tells me that I need to stop protecting her and just call CPS. He says I'm only delaying her eventual arrest. He's telling me that I need to worry about myself and not try to save her. I disagree. I know that what I'm doing is wrong and I'm only buying time, but it's the only way that she can live a relatively normal life. If I don't intervene, she'll be alternating between jail and binge drinking. I know that I'm already irreparably damaged from all of this, but I still feel like I can do something to save her from herself.

The thing is - in situations like this, you're not pulling her up to your level. She's dragging you down to hers. You say if you don't intervene, she'll alternate between jail and binge drinking. Right now, she's just binge drinking, which hardly seems like it's all that better. People in your mother's situation can't be gently nudged to do the right thing. They need some pretty big wake-up calls to get their life in order. I'm siding with your father. Call CPS.

Lex

 

I don't mean to sound harsh, but I really think your dad is right. You should call CPS and let them know what is going on. Doing so isn't saying that you don't love your mom or don't care about her. You're calling because you do care about her, but you know that things aren't right. Actually, if you call CPS and they come in and take you away, it might be what she needs to get help to be honest. Most people in situations like that need a pretty big wake up call before they'll get things straightened out, and having you taken away and having to figure things out on her own might really help her see what she needs to do. Often times, CPS can work with the parents to help them find the help they need and get their lives in order and their kids back, so it could actually give her a little bit of a support system if she wants the help.