Ok, with it being my senior year of high school, two of my friends have promised that they would be draging me to prom, no matter what. I used to think that they would change their minds once they found out about me being gay. About a two weeks ago, I came out to both of them. I asked one of them about the proom thing, and he just said 'oh you're still going. Its your senior year. You will be going to prom.' I mentioned it to one of my lesbian friends, and she was saying 'ok T is taking A, M is taking K, so who are you taking?' I just responded 'I have no clue.' Now she wants me to ask one of my neighbors (who I used to have a crush on) (and I think he is straight, though she thinks he is bi) to prom. She was saying 'well it could be fun, plus you would find out if he is gay/bi' Anyway, I guess these are my issues: 1) who to ask to prom? (I don't know too many gay people. Plus I doubt that many people on ec can help me on this one) 2) what to do about asking the neighbor? (My friend will be asking me about it) 3) also I don't even know if taking another boy to prom would even be acceptable here. 4) I don't know if I am ready to be that out 5)I just wish the voices would shut up
Pfft you don't have to take someone you want to go out with neccesarily, my own prom's coming up next year and I'm evan helping plan it and raise funds Proms just some fun for everyone at the end of their school lives together, it dosen't have to be a date if you don't want it to be. If there's a guy you want to take then go for it, I don't know if Prom means more to people where you are than here but as long as you're in agreement I'd either take a girl you're friends with since it's just alot of fun, or a guy if you can find one since I can't see how or why the school should stop you. About asking your neighbor I'd just ease the subject onto prom and ask him who he's going with if at all, if he's not bi or gay he may take offence to you directly asking though he shouldn't, try being subtle or hinting at it if you can.
Tell your friends that you don't feel comfortable having the prom being your official outing. Then offer to go stag. Lex
Yeah sorry I should've said that is if you actually want to go in the first place, if you really don't want to go don't let them pressure you.
I don't mind pressuring you. YOU DON'T NEED A DATE TO GO TO THE PROM, SO JUST GO! These days most people don't even take their partners to the prom anymore. They bring friends (both opposite sex and same sex), cousins/relatives and stuff like that. They just want to have fun and end their high school years with a bang. Everyone comes together, gets belligerently drunk, dances the night away, go to the after party, and crash at 7AM. You don't wanna miss out on that just because you don't have a date. If you're really insecure about it though, you can just bring a friend and say she/he's your "date" in a sense, but not really. That's what I did, and no one cared and we all had a blast. Also, if you don't feel comfortable, don't bring a guy to the prom. If you're going to be worried the entire night if people are staring/talking about you, it's better to just not do it. But if not than I say ask a guy you know is gay. If you're crush isn't at least bi it could get messy...(unless you bring him as a friend, which is acceptable nowadays). This is just how things are in my area so....take everyone's advice with a grain of salt because each area is different.
It's one of those things that if you don't go, you'll almost surely wish you did later on. Prom is something that sort of marks the shift from one part of life to another. As for whether or not you take a guy... that's up to you. But it's what, 6 months away? So you have some time to think about it. I think it would be incredibly cool to take a guy to prom, but that's a decision you'll have to make, and I can see that being that visible could be a challenge. But maybe it's an opportunity to stretch yourself a bit... and also to perhaps change some perceptions of others in a positive way. (I'd suggest, if you do take a male date, that he wear a tux rather than a dress... no sense stretching things *too* far in Tennessee!) On the other hand, if taking another guy is just too far outside the comfort zone, you can go stag, or you can take a girl... but if you do that, you definitely want to be clear with her that you're gay, otherwise it wouldn't be fair to her. Let us know what you're thinking and what you decide!
I didn't go to my classes prom last year and I still don't care. Dances weren't and still aren't my thing and I didn't have anyone to go with that would help me have fun there so I just ignored it. If you really don't want to go then don't. Don't let anyone pressure you into doing something you don't.
I'm like Walolas; dances really aren't my thing either, especially since most high school students take a bunch of drugs before they go to them. I will go with my boyfriend when the time comes since proms aren't nearly as bad as regular dances, but don't feel that you have to do anything.
Was mine the only prom where the vast majority of students were NOT drunk or stoned off their gourds? I mean, I did know that I apparently had the only prom featuring a band that was actually excellent... Lex
i spent my money for the prom on the after party instead getting massivly drunk and all mates said i made the right choice, as thery feel they were scamed out of 50 quid for a shit prom! so i geuss u did have the only excellent prom, no one i know enjoyed thiers unless they were completely fucked
I just went by myself to my prom and even though it wasnt that fun since everyone had their own dates to dance with, it was better than being home. And it was nice, the only thing i wish i wouldve done was dance. But now i can say i went to prom. So if u dont wanna go then dont. And if u still have some wants to go the go. You dont necessarily have to take someone.. just my opinion
I must say that even though I was totally against going at first, I ended up having a great time at my prom. It helps if you don't see it as "this magical moment in which childhood ends" that it gets made out to be. It's just a final get-together with all of your graduating year. In which you hang out, relive some stories, share a few laughs, and then go home after an enjoyable evening. As for dates: I wasn't out back then even to myself, but I just decided to be pragmatic. I didn't have/want a grlfriend, and I knew a girl that didn't want/have a boyfriend. So I just came to an arrangement with her that we were going to make an entrance together, have a few dances, and be completely free to act as we wanted on the evening. I'm not saying that's what you should do, but it did work out pretty well for me. I'd honestly advise against a prom being any kind of combined (first) date/outing. Especially if it involves asking a guy out who might even not be gay/bi. Going stag or with a friend is perfectly acceptable!
That's kind of how it went with me. A female friend of mine was dating an older guy (I think he was 24, and she was 18), and the guy considered prom to be "juvenile", and so wouldn't go with her. So I offered to go as her "date" instead. Neither of us had any misconceptions about it - we simply went as friends. Lex
The Proms/home comings at my school suck. There are like 2 people 'cause it's a private/catholic school and every year without fail people act like jackasses whether it's moshing to slow dance music, "sandwiching" our religion teacher, or a blonde 'bimbo' getting drunk and throwing up on someone. Still, funny. Funny when you see two guys jokingly grinding up on each other lol.
