I'm not sure if I even have a problem. Or how to really begin to explain it.. But I'll try my best, so bare with me here.... Please? I've had a few short relationships.. Key word short - I've terminated them all. All for the same reason. I can't seem to like people more than what I feel on a friendship level. I mean.. I see these people for a few weeks - we get along well, we spark, there's conversation, people say we're great together. But when it comes to me actually feeling something for him, there's.. nothing there.. My mind draws up a blank. I can feel that they like me.. but I have no idea how to reciprocate. At this point, my brain locks up and I'm finding any excuse to leave as quickly as possible, and make the stupidest excuses to not see them again. As for actually having sex with them, I can't actually go through with it. I'm by no means a stranger to sex in any way shape or form.. but if I'm trying to be involved with these guys, Nothing happens.. Which results in me avoiding it at all costs. When I inevitably end it, because I cant bring myself to spend any time with them.. They rightfully want to know a reason, and when I tell them it's because I wasn't feeling anything for them - they understandably are let down and hurt.. At which point I start hating myself, because he was a truly great person, yet theres nothing there on my end. There never has been with any of my relationships. It's like.. I'm hugging you, but wheres the emotion that goes with this action? I feel even worse, because I've stung these guys along, because I want to feel something.. but then find that it's no use - because the same thing happens again. I'm at a loss.. I have no idea why I feel this way, and it hurts.
A couple things come to mind. >>>As for actually having sex with them, I can't actually go through with it. I'm by no means a stranger to sex in any way shape or form.. but if I'm trying to be involved with these guys, Nothing happens... You're "not a stranger to sex". This seems to indicate you HAVE had sex...well, let me use the term "satisfactorily"...satisfactorily in the past. What was the situation there? Who were you with, and how do you think it differed? Other than that, I'd say you simply haven't "clicked" with somebody yet. And that happens. Some people can "click" with lots of people, and therefore can be in a romantic and/or sexual relationship almost at will. But with others, they just don't feel that spark. And rather than try to push it forward and hope it comes later, I've found it's best to lay it all bare. "I do like you, but honestly, I'm not really feeling any spark with you. If you'd like to go out and do some stuff one-on-one to see if something happens, I'm totally up for that." This lets people know precisely where they stand, and gives them the option of "pursuing" it or looking elsewhere. Lex
