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My first time

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by learning, Oct 4, 2010.

  1. learning

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    I've been having gay fantasies my whole life. I am completely into women, but the sexual aspect of having animal sex with a man has always turned me on. I don't know if I'm bi or what. I don't really care. I've never acted on it before in any way. Like many of you I have been afraid of anyone finding out because of the fact that people talk about it. Like that's such a big deal, but for some reason it leads to a ton of stress. Anyway, I am going on my first cruise ever (not a gay cruise) and I wanted to find a guy to have sex with for my first time. I figured it would be a perfect avenue to find a guy for some casual sex, but I have 0 clue how to pick up a guy. I know the thing about tapping your foot in a bathroom, but I don't think that avenue's for me for my first time. Help please!
     
  2. Filip

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    Hi, and wlecome to EC! :smilewave

    I'll dispense with the obligatory advice about taking it slow and carefully for your first time. You already made up your mind that you want to go for the hookup first. So I'd say that if you feel it's the way to go, it can help!

    That said, I frankly don't think that you want your first time to be with a random stranger in a bathroom either. For starters, you don't know anything about what turns this random stranger on, and vice versa. Which might make for rather bad sex.
    The sex might be unsafe. You might get the signals wrong and end up in an embarassing situation with a straight guy who just liked to tap his foot :icon_wink

    I'd say that in this case, you might want to check a hookup site instead. That way you're sure to meet men who are completely on the same page. You can do some pre-screening for people you'd find attractive. You can set up a meeting time and place convenient for the both of you. You can discuss what you do and don't want. And you don't have to go through awkward rituals that may or may not work.
    If you do do this, obviously make sure that when it happens, you have a way out in case the other person isn't what he says he is.
     
  3. Lexington

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    Welcome to EC! :wave:

    We've all got sexual fantasies, and not all of them need to be fulfilled. But if you've had this fantasy for awhile, and it still turns you on, then yeah - you might want to give it a go. I don't think the cruise is a good place to find somebody to hook up with, though. (Admittedly, I've only been on Disney cruises...) There's really no protocol to finding a guy on a cruise ship so far as I know, and if it doesn't go well, you're stuck on the boat with him until the end of the cruise. :grin:

    Instead, as Filip suggests, you can actively solicit for somebody to have sex with. I won't go into the how-tos and what-to-look-out-fors here, as there's plenty of people under the age of consent here, and I'd rather not write them out for the world to see. But if you're interested in trying this route, send me a private message (click my name to the left there, select "send a private message"), and I'll give you the rundown.

    Lex