Well, I know this is a ridiculously stupid thing to ask, but can I get a reminder as to why homosexuality isn't a bad thing? The situation is that I really try hard not to be selective with my friends, and it just so happens that the ones I hang out with the majority of the time our conservative Christian. Not that there's anything wrong with that; it's just well, impossible to have a conversation about homosexuality (with these particular conservative christians), and sometimes I feel like I just need to talk about it to be reminded that I'm not a bad person based on sexuality. It's also quite unreassuring to have constant thoughts as to how they perceive me because I don't want to ask them. I guess ultimately I just want to hear that they're okay with it, but because of their beliefs (and some poking and prodding with subtle comments and questions), I know that they don't approve of it, though they're still willing to be my friend for some reason... Sorry, this is kind of a stupid post I guess.
I also kinda have the same problem with my friends. Luckly I have a few that I can talk with which really helps. The person I am most open with is one of my roommates and she is bi so we tell each other everything that maybe we dont want to tell others.
I just wouldn't talk about it with those friends. If you do, just say "Look, I know you don't approve, but you don't hate me for it, right?". I'd also suggest making some gay friends if you don't have any/many. <<< Hey that rhymed lol....I'm a dork.
Well, to me that would fall under being "selective with your friends." Sure I've made acquaintances with people who are homosexual, but I didn't befriend them or feel the desire to befriend them based on the fact that they're homosexual. I don't really know how others perceive this, but to me, it just doesn't seem right for some reason. I try to be as non-judgemental as possible (I know people are judgemental no matter what, but we can all try to be LESS judgemental I think).
Hi there! Let me start by saying that there is no stupid post. It is a legitimate question and worry because you want your friends (in particular if they are close friends) to be okay with it and be accepting and supportive of you. If your friends are still willing to be friends with you and are talking with you, it could be quite possible that they are having a hard time and need perhaps more time in accepting or reconciling their beliefs with their knowledge that they have a friend who is gay. That said, your friends (based on what you have said) in all likelihood value your friendship, and see beyond your sexuality which is already something positive here and something to hang on to. By continuing the friendship, they allow themselves to learn that 'hey, your sexuality doesn't change you, and nor does it change the friendship.' Your sexual identity has no influence on what makes you, you. In that way it is actually reassuring that they still perceive you as their friend. In another way, and even though they might not say it, they are telling you that they are okay with it. You know that you are not a bad person based on your sexuality. Remind yourself of it as well on a regular basis. If you feel that it would be good to expand your circle of friends, maybe try joining a LGBT support group either at school or in your community. That would help a bit in having reassurances that there is nothing wrong with being gay. You are not a bad person. Hope this helps a bit. (*hug*)
