1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

First "Date"

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by mydogstewie, Oct 22, 2010.

  1. mydogstewie

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Oct 21, 2009
    Messages:
    244
    Likes Received:
    0
    Okay, so me and this guy have been talking for a while over facebook and text...and we're finally meeting.

    We're going to hang out at the mall and just get to know eachother

    I'm really nervous...the reason I'm so nervous is because this girl likes me and i like her back..except, she wants me to wait for her!

    I've been waiting for almost a month and I really want her to take me or let me go...

    I don't know what to do? What do I tell her?! D:

    Thanks
     
  2. Lexington

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 20, 2007
    Messages:
    11,409
    Likes Received:
    11
    Location:
    Colorado
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    "Wait for her" how? Don't date anybody else? (If so, until when?) Don't do anything physical with her? (If so, until when?)

    Lex
     
  3. mydogstewie

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Oct 21, 2009
    Messages:
    244
    Likes Received:
    0
    She wanted to "sort out her feelings" before we got back together...she said we would be going out again the future but she won't say when
     
  4. yourillusion

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Sep 7, 2010
    Messages:
    141
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Boston
    Sounds kind of stressful! If she wants you to just hang around in hopes that she *might* come around to being interested again, sounds like you could miss an opportunity to meet a nice guy and she may change her mind. Can you see how your meeting the new guy goes and then tell her something?

    Good luck! :\
     
  5. Lexington

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 20, 2007
    Messages:
    11,409
    Likes Received:
    11
    Location:
    Colorado
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I'd just tell her "Well, if you want to go out again sometime, let me know"...then feel free to pursue other options if you so desire.

    Lex
     
  6. mydogstewie

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Oct 21, 2009
    Messages:
    244
    Likes Received:
    0
    She's mad. I cancelled with the guy...and she's still mad...D:
     
  7. stad90

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Oct 21, 2010
    Messages:
    77
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Los Angeles, CA
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    All but family
    A month is a long time to be in limbo... tell her she should make a decision or else you should move on. It doesn't seem fair to you that you should have to "wait" for an unknown period of time when there are other potential prospects out there.
     
  8. Lexington

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 20, 2007
    Messages:
    11,409
    Likes Received:
    11
    Location:
    Colorado
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Then let her be mad.

    Look, if she's not ready to commit to a second date - even a platonic second date - that's totally fine. But that's HER issue to deal with, not yours. You're not insisting on a second date. You're saying "If you'd like to go on a second date, let me know." She doesn't have the right to say "I might decide I want to go out with you again...but you can't go out with anybody else until I make up my mind". That's just manipulative. And if she's playing these games now before she even gets around to deciding if she WANTS to date you again, I can guarantee they're not going to stop if/when you get around to dating some more. Frankly, this tells you all you really need to know - "not worth it".

    Lex