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Should I be worried?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Bario, Oct 24, 2010.

  1. Bario

    Bario Guest

    I am wondering if I should worry about my dad and his drinking.
    I dont think he has any sort of addiction, less that he is an alchoholic, but he does drink a lot. Not everyday, but every friday, if not every other day. I dont know if it is causing him any damage, or if I should be worried. He is a very level headed kind of person, and he isnt the kind of idiot who would let himself get into something like this, which is why I dont know if this is a problem.
    Every friday, without fail, he will go to the pub after work, and piss up a bit with his mates. Now that in itself is fine, but most of the time he will stumble home blind drunk. If there is any beer or wine or anything in the house, he will drink it. I think thats probably just him drinking because its there, but again, I dont know if I should be worrying. He doesnt get violent, he doesnt get angry, he just gets annoying, so it isnt affecting anyone else in the house. I sort of realised it may be a problem the other day; we were having a bbq, my aunt, uncle and cousins were down from QLD. Dad got into the drink fairly early, and by the end of the night, he was a fair nuisance. I dont know if it was the drink, or just an innocent mistake, but he accidentally slapped my 3 yo cousin in the face, quite hard. It was a completely innocent action, and he was completely sorry for it, but I cant help but feel that if he hadnt been drinking, it wouldnt have happened.
    He can drink sensibly sometimes. Tonight I think he has had 2, maybe 3 beers, and I dont think he will be drinking much more, he has work in the morning. But most nights, he will hit that point where he has had enough to drink that he wont stop.
    I dont know if I should be complaining about this, its his body he is ruining, but I cant stand it anymore. Whenever mum takes that left turn, into the liquor shop, at the exit of woolworths, I cringe, and I tense up. (It doesnt help that she wanders around looking at things for hours before picking something.) She doesnt need it, he doesnt need it, and I wish she could see how much I hate it.
    Mum doesnt drink much, I dont think I have ever seen her drunk, even a little bit. She hates it when dad drinks and annoys her all night, yet she still goes in and buys it.
    I dont know if my brothers are affected by this, my older brother drinks a bit himself, and my little brother is just as much of an annoying idiot as my dad, and he tends to play along when he is drunk, but it annoys me.
    I know it isnt my problem, but I cant help think about it that way.
     
    #1 Bario, Oct 24, 2010
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 24, 2010
  2. MusicIsLife

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    By the way you're talking about it, it sounds like you're in denial, i'm just saying.

    My dad, uncle, grandfather and a few relatives on my moms side were all alcoholics. That doesnt automatically mean they would be piss drunk every day, but it did mean they had a problem, and could hide it well.

    In the case of your dad, if the slap was a first time thing I think it should send up alarm bells for you that his drinking is beginning to get out of hand, and you might want to talk to someone about it. A councellor at school or maybe something like alateen. Idk what its called in Australia, but its basically a group for teens dealing with alcoholism around them, like drunken parents. Right now, thats the best you can do.
     
  3. RedState

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    Well, coming from someone who drinks more than they should I have a little personal knowledge on this subject.

    There is a vast difference between have a few drinks at happy hour every after noon, and getting just plastered shit-canned drunk every night.

    You said he would come home from the pub blind drunk...and then want to drink some more. I do that at times, but it's mainly after tailgating at a football game all day and I have no clue what I am doing.
    If it is a once in a while thing when he does that, it is no big deal.
    If it is an everyday thing, then there is a problem...because he is allowing the substance to control him, instead of he controlling it.

    There are also things called "week-end alcoholics"...those are folks that stay pretty clean during the week, but just get completely blitzed all week-end (a lot of college kids fit in this category)

    The slapping thing most certainly was due to the alcohol.

    I wouldn't be worried about it to the point where it consumes you, but I do think it warrants some concern on your part.