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Really lonely

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Bario, Oct 27, 2010.

  1. Bario

    Bario Guest

    I want a boyfriend, really bad. I cant be myself around my family or friends, and I want someone really close, to be me around. I wish I could have that sort of a relationship with someone, but I just cant. I get really nervous about everything in my life, and I would never be able to ask someone out, and I am hardly a prize pig, so nobody would ever ask me out.
    I just get so lonely sometimes, sitting by myself, doing jack all. Sure, I have friends, and family, but they can only keep me company on one level. I dont know how much sense I am making, but it isnt company I am missing, it is a certain kind of company. I want someone who I can squeeze a hug out of everyday, and get to know really well, and who I can talk to about my problems without fear of them judging me about it.
    Gah, I just dont know what is going on in my life at the moment. If anything, this should be my last concern, my school work is WAY more important than this crap, but I cant stop thinking about it.
     
  2. Mogget

    Full Member

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    Contrary to popular belief, school is not more important than your mental health. Given the choice of having one fail, it's better to have school fail.

    And it sounds to me like you need a good friend as much as a boyfriend. One of my friends performs many of the same emotional functions a bf would: physical contact (though not of the same sort), someone to vent to, and someone to get to know better. While I'd love to have a bf, I can compensate many of my emotional needs through my friends.

    Finally, over time you may find your confidence builds up, especially if you seek out therapy. Putting yourself out there is tough, but it is possible to build the confidence needed to do so.
     
  3. VentinIntrovert

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    Yeah I totally understand how you feel. I am in the same predicament. Too bad you weren't a little older and lived where I lived lol. Your patience will eventually pay off. You seem like a really nice dude...
     
  4. Bario

    Bario Guest

    I do have some good friends, and they are great, but I have never been, and probably never will be a touchy feely kind of person. I can only open up to people really close to me, even my family isnt close enough for that sort of thing.
    It isnt even such a deal about my cinfidence really. I know for a fact that I am unnatractive, I will not dispute that. And I know that physical attraction isnt the only kind, less even very important, but you need the physical attraction to start you off. Even if after 30 minutes of getting to knwo someone you find somehting more attractive about them than their looks, you still need that first 30 minutes of being atttracted to them physically. This here is my problem, I dont have 30 minutes worth of good looks, I dont even have 5 minutes worth.
    And I guess school really isnt as important as other things, although my parents would dispute that with thier lives. I am doing bad enough at school already, I just dont need to drop down lower.
     
  5. stad90

    Regular Member

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    I know how you feel... as loving as friends can be, they can't replace loving embraces, or looking into a lover's eyes, or...doing other things... :wink: Just gotta keep looking and keep moving forward. Keep on top of priorities, but also keep an eye out for someone like you who may be in the same situation.

    As one of the guys in Google's "It Gets Better" video said, you will be loved. Somebody will love you for who you are.