So, I am trying to figure out a few things with regards to myself. Here are some things I know - Had a ton of girlfriends since girls started finding me attractive - Was married for several years - Have a couple of kids - Still find women really attractive - Split up with the wife a while back and have been celibate for 18+ months (unemployed so no money to go out and "pull" atm) So far so "normal". This is how else I have been feeling though: - Have a thing for muscular women and find em really attractive, but only the ones who still look feminine facially, this has been going on for quite a few years but not forever if you know what I mean - Female bobybuilders who use steroids end up with really large clitorises - this really turns me on - In the last few years I have started finding pre-op transexuals (sorry but easiest way to describe em is shemales - hope this doesn't offend anyone) a turn on, but again ones who look fairly feminine (I know they have one very masculine part lol) Ok, so now here is what else I "know": - I don't find guys attractive. I feel sure I wouldn't like to kiss a guy - I REALLY really find girls attractive So bearing all that in mind, I feel if I met a "shemale" (a feminine good looking one) I would be happy doing anything with her and for her to do anything to me (not necessarily on a one night stand basis but more so in a relationship basis, certainly if she was to perform sex acts on me) I get turned on however by the thought of getting a guy to perform oral on me and would possibly return the favour. If I met some really attractive muscular woman or a non muscular attractive women then I would like that. So, question is, am I a closet gay or just desperate for some action? I really hope some peeps can help me think this out
Welcome to EC! My general response to "what am I?" is "you're you". A label is something that fits you, not vice versa. You like what you like, and you are what you are. Are you a "closet gay"? Probably not. You don't sound like you've got a huge mental block about "other guys", at any rate. So if you say they don't interest you much more beyond "possibly returning the favor" if a guy gave you a blow job, I'm inclined to think that's as far as that goes. So what do I think is going on? You're straight. And you possibly have a kink towards the she-male side. Nothing wrong with that - we've all got our "things". The fact that you've been celibate for some time usually indicates that the porn consumption is going up. And often, when that happens, we tend to "push our boundaries". We check out more "out there" things in order to maintain a high level of excitement. As such, we might find our boundaries pushing outwards. And I'm guessing that's what's happening here. Lex
Ty for the welcome Thx for your thoughts. I feel glad to be able to just air these thoughts with someone even if (or especially if) they are on the other side of the world on the internet. But the shemale thing has been for a while, long before this dry spell and so has the whole "muscle-chick" thing. Just trying to give everyone as much info as to what is going on in my head, hopefully to get some more reasoned responses. Also, I wanted to add that I am feeling more and more inclined to find a guy to give me some oral...and I know I'm not unattractive and being a "minority" (wont go into any further detail here) means I am pretty sure I could find a chap fairly easily.
>>>But the shemale thing has been for a while, long before this dry spell and so has the whole "muscle-chick" thing. Like I said, we all got our things. And if you've been celibate for awhile, that's often when we let our inner freak out. >>>Also, I wanted to add that I am feeling more and more inclined to find a guy to give me some oral...and I know I'm not unattractive and being a "minority" (wont go into any further detail here) means I am pretty sure I could find a chap fairly easily. Oddly, your best card here isn't going to be your minority status. Or even your attractiveness. It'll be being straight. Lex
