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My mom is -too- accepting of my religion?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by MusicIsLife, Nov 22, 2010.

  1. MusicIsLife

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    So, first off my family is catholic (though no one really strictly follows it) and I recently began to practice paganism. Its not a big deal, my brother doesn't get it, but hes still very much Christian/Catholic in terms of his beliefs so I dont push it.

    As for my mom, she's too accepting to the point where it's freaking me out a little. Questions I understand, and I answered them as best I could, I have an altar set up in my room, she doesn't care, I wear a pentagram in public, no big deal.

    The problem comes from her wanting to observe my rituals. Now, to someone of mainstream/catholic beliefs or similar, a ritual is pretty much the same thing as prayer. If I need luck, I do a ritual, if I want to bless a charm, i do a ritual, etc. At the holidays one of my friends comes over and we do our sabbat ritual together.

    She wants to watch me sit amidst candles and insence and watch me whisper more or less to myself. I don't know about you guys, but that seriously weirds me out. if I was part of a large coven, by all means I'd let her come, but I'm a lone practitoner for the most part, and to have someone sit and watch me is just...weird.

    I've tried to explain this to her as "What if a buddhist/sikh/shinto/etc came up to you and said, 'oh WOW! You're CATHOLIC?! Can I watch you PRAY?!" and she scoffed and said I was being "too sensitive". :bang:

    So my question here is, how do I portray to my mom that my rituals and rites are my own private thing, and she can't watch? Because she doesn't seem to get it. :/
     
  2. Mogget

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    Prayer, ritual, meditation, and similar are deeply spiritual and thus deeply private things. Your mother is probably curious about just what you do in ritual. My suggestion is to show her an example of what you do without really doing it, if that makes any sense. But make it clear that your rituals, like her prayers, are not for entertainment.

    You might also point out that it's more than a little unnerving to be watched when you're doing important things. Harder to keep focus and such. This is important to you and you don't want to be distracted.

    I took classes from a Zen priest a few years ago and he was adamant about not letting observers in the temple. Anyone who came had to sit zazen and take part in the ceremony.
     
  3. TheEdend

    TheEdend Guest

    I think its pretty cool that your mom is supportive. Don't take that for granted.

    Like Liam said, you could show her an example of what you do. If you are uncomfortable just tell her nicely and I think she will understand.

    I can understand your mom's curiosity, though. I don't really follow a religion right now, but theology fascinates me. I have gone to multiple churches with friends just to see exactly what they do and experience it for myself. I have also invited friends to a catholic mass because they are just curious about it all.

    I say that you try to enjoy your mom a little and try to maybe get to a compromise?