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Rebound?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Jordano, Jan 29, 2006.

  1. Jordano

    Regular Member

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    Okay - so you all know about my sad story of my boyfriend ending us because his parents gave him the choice of liking guys or being with them. Well it's been a week now, I still love him and miss him, but this weekend at a party I ended up making out with this guy and there was a lot of touching (with clothes on). He was drunk so I don't really know if he has feelings or was just having some fun, I'd guess more fun cause that's what it was for me, but if he wants to start something would it be a rebound on my part? Personally, I think it would be and if he asks I'd say no anyway because I'm just not ready for another relationship but what do you guys think?
     
  2. Paul_UK

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    I think it would be too soon for another relationship. It depends what he wants, though. If he just wants some "fun", and that appeals to you too, then why not.... However you may well find yourself getting more attached, which would make things worse for you and could end up unwittingly involving someone else.

    It also depends on whether you and our b/f are really over, or whether he could get fed up with going along with his folks' wishes and want to come back. It sounds unlikely though, at least in the short term.

    If it is really over, then you need to pick yurself up and carry on with your life. Which means looking for someone else. Although is is rather soon, potential partners don't come along every day so perhaps you shouldn't let it go completely. If you still have that guy's contact details, maybe you could arrange to meet up for a drink somewhen and find out what he wants. If it looks like there is something there, you should let him know a bit about your situation and make it clear that you want to take things slowly.
     
  3. TriBi

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    Well, Paul pretty much said what I was going to suggest.

    Friends are always good to have, so, if the guy is keen I would let him know what has happened and how that makes you reluctant to jump straight into another relationship - but tell him you'd be happy to be friends, hang around together etc - and see where that leads in a bit more time.

    I could be that your feelings for your previous b/f may diminish and strengthen toward this guy - or maybe not. Either way, it gives you more time to work out your true feelings.