I almost didn’t post this because I see a lot of people feeling pretty much the same way. But I don’t think my situation is exactly the same so I guess here it goes. For a long time now I get these moods where I’m really upset. It usually starts with me thinking about how lonely I am. But I feel like this is getting worse. I think I may be depressed but I’m hesitant to go straight for that explanation, because I don’t feel like that 100% of the time. But lately it’s been really bad. I started bawling three times today just because I looked at the symptoms for depression and could identify with almost all of them. I don’t find joy in things like I used to. And the past few days have been especially bad, I’m crying like crazy. I’m up late at night and I sleep in until 2pm at Least, unless someone wakes me up. I don’t want to do anything. This whole year I’m doing even worse in school. I can’t get myself to study for quizzes or tests. Homework is almost never really done. And I'm getting really agitated and frustrated with things and myself, and I'm always wanting to just punch something (not someone) I’m not on any medication for this. Part of me wants to see a doctor and see if something can help me. But then there’s the part that doesn’t want to do anything because I believe it’ll just pass. Or I’m hoping that some guy will find me and make me happy again, which is ridiculous I know : ( I don’t really know what I should do. By the way, I do feel really horrible about myself. And I feel like I absolutely hate my life, but I'm not suicidal. I always have the hope that at some point something good will happen in my life. So I never really think about seriously ending my own life
These are all the clinical signs of depression. I have definitely been here too. And I know all the signs from an outsider's perspective as well, from helping my girlfriend cope with her severe depression and anxiety. You have to go to a doctor. Depression is a disease just like any other, and it can be treated and healed. There are many medications out there that can help make life a little more sunny and hopeful again. Seeing a counselor can help too, because talking with someone and externalizing your emotions can do wonders towards unearthing the original cause of the depression. Once you can fix that, you will feel great again. I wish you the best of luck, but most of all I wish you the courage to pick up the phone and call the doctor. You don't have to feel bad about it. Depression is one of the worst diseases out there, and any doctor will understand how serious it is to you.
Oh my gosh... You have no idea how that hit me right on. You and I are exactly alike in that aspect. It's scary. I hate how I always feel... I feel like there's no hope for me. Like I'll be the one exception who never finds anyone. ...Idk...
Hiya! It sounds to me like you are suffering from depression. Go to your doctor and try to get a referal to a therapist. Be careful with antidepressants, they can actually make things a lot worse.
thanks everyone, I think I'm gonna try and go see the doctor and figure out what to do about it. It's just getting worse lately I'm right there with ya. I'm always afraid I'm never going to find anyone and I'm gonna end up one of those people that's alone forever :icon_sad:
Oh how I know that fear! I get my depressions about every three months. I think from your description I can say that mine aren't as severe as yours, but I find it hard to get up in the morning, do anything really. It is hard to make me laugh (which I usually do all the time), I cannot concentrate and don't want to do any work. I even don't feel bad about not doing anything for the first days, but slowly I cannot even stand myself for that reason. I dwell in self-pity and cry and cry. And then I am convinced that there is nobody in this world who really loves me, that I could die that instant and nobody would notice for days, etc. Then, when I finally got over this (it usually takes between 4-7 days) I see how wrong I am. I mean, yeah, I have no partner and I don't have many very close friends around. Contact to my family is sparse, BUT there are many people around me that really like me, even if we are not very close. I call myself very lucky to have found some colleagues that are just as lonely as I am and, without naming it thus, we formed some kind of self-help group, keeping each other busy so we know we are not alone. And when my depressions come back, I try to cling to that thought. But I must say, that sometimes it looks like I am bipolar or something, cause when I am down, I am very, very down :tears:, and when I am happy, I am very, very happy, :eusa_danc wanting to hug the whole world, loving every particle that surrounds me. As much as I like the latter, I'd rather be more balanced! I really hope that you'll find a doctor who can help you!!! Let us know how it went. You see: you are NOT alone!!! ;-)
Thank you so much (*hug*) Luckily, I felt a lot better today. I haven't started anything yet, I just generally felt better. I didn't have this complete sinking feeling that I've been feeling over the past week. I still got kind of upset easily, but I was in a better mood overall and I actually got myself to finish this art project that I haven't been able to make myself work on. I think I'm very similar to you. I don't necessarily get depressed all the time, but it does come around every once in a while. Sometimes more often than others. I got not exactly an anti-depressant pill, but more like just a general vitamin that's suppose to boost my mood, just to try and see if it helps any.
I'm glad I ran into this post. Gave me hope and drive to talk to a professional on the subject. Maybe even my parents. I know I need to vocalizes my feelings a bit more. I also feel this way. I have ups and downs. More downs than ups lately. I have been noticing this more and more. The feeling of being alone and not wanted. Hope all goes well with everyone
