Recently i started getting these episodes where i curl up into a ball, my body tingles all over sometimes i even shake and i feel awful/terrible that i struggle to do anything even speak. They've become more frequent and intence to the point where it's happening several times a day. They seem to happen for no reason and when they do i can't think all i can do is feel the worst i've felt in my life. I find it really hard to describe, i'm sorry if the post dosn't make much sence. It's really starting to interfere with my life, they occur more often in social situations than when I am alone. Dose anyone know what is happening to me? because these episodes terrifies me.:tears:
Hi there! I think it makes sense, and I'm glad you wrote it out! (*hug*) Maybe try expanding on a few things in your post. What it is happening in your life at the moment? Do you find yourself under a lot of stress? Do you become anxious/fearful when you are in social situations? Often times, when we think about certain situations or things that are coming towards as, contentiously or subconsciously our body start responding. It is sending messages. It's actually good that you are listening to it and try figuring out what causes it. Maybe try looking at what it is going on in your life at the moment. What might help you is talking to someone about things. Just let them out, even if they seem insignificant to you at the moment. (*hug*)
I have been in the same boat during many years and I know how horrible it feels (*hug*). It's like a massive panick attack where all the muscles in your body tetanise and you like you're going to die or something like that. I used to have those kind of crisis happening to me several time a day. First thing, talk to your doctor about it. They can give you medecine that would healp decrease your anxiety and maybe something that can help when you feel a crisis is coming. They also can check if there is nothing else going on that could explain those problems or be a part of them. Second thing, tell your family and friends about it so that they know how to react when it's happening to you. I can be very scary for someone who doesn't know what's going on. And the last thing you need when this is happening to you is to have people around who are panicking.So tell them that this might happen and that the best thing to do is to stay calm, to sit next to you, to make sure you're warm enought and if necessary to put a cover on you and then to stay there talking to you and patting your back (having someone calm and reassuring around when those crisis happen can help immensly). What I discover when I had those kind of problems is that it makes things worse (if possible) to try to resist it. What I used to do that was helping, when I felt a crisis was going to happen is to tell the people around if I was not alone, then put myself in the most comfortable possition I could with something to keep me warm (as in my case, I felt extremly cold when it was happening) and then I closed my eyes and I tried to focus not on what was happening but on imagining a place where I feel safe and happy. I tried to imagine it with as many details as possible, the colors, the sounds, the light... ect and in the same time I was trying to breathe as slowly as possible. I know it sounds like a plaster on a wooden leg, but doing that really did help me to get out of those crisis more quickly. I hope this can help a little (*hug*) feel free to contact me anytime if you want to talk about it. Take care, Cécile
thanks for the advice, I had just put feeling cold during the attacks due to being ridiculously underweight (I'm under 7 stone and 5"7). well in my life recently i ran away from home(http://emptyclosets.com/forum/showthread.php?t=41015), and two days ago finally move back in. One of my best friends is suicidal. Another friend was badly ill and is now slowly recovering, My dad is really annoying me by being patronising, condescending, arrogant and belittling way too much. I can handle it in small doses of him but that's all, he dose it way too much for me to cope. I just feel like my life's in peril.
Well, being underweight might not help with this issue. Did you have had your blood pressure tested recently ? I know that I tend to feel cold when my blood pressure is too low. For one thing, I know that during those crisis you feel like you're going to die, and I know how scary it is. But you're not going to die from them. They are extremly uncomfortable, but you're not going to die from it. It's probably more than anything the sign that you can't deal with all the things that are happening in your life and that you could use some help. Is there anyone you trust who you can talk to about what you have to deal with and how it makes you feel ? And once again, talking to your doctor would be great. First to check there is nothing else going on with you but extreme stress and anxiety. Second because they can give you some medication to help you deal with this. And maybe try to download some relaxations sessions, that may help you learning how to breathe and relax yourself wich can be helpful when you have to face a crisis. Once again, if you need to talk or if you think I can help in any way, just let me know. Take care (*hug*) Cécile
Well I went to the doctor to day after my mum dragged me about the rashes on my arm's which I've had all summer to see how to can get rid of them. But unfortunately we got side tracked about my weight issue as have dropped about 4 stone over the summer. And as I haven't told my mum about my anxiety attacks I was reluctant to bring them up in conversation with the doctor in front of my mum. I doubt that i will see a doctor again in a while as I seem to developed a fear of them. I have noticed this week the I only seem to have episodes around two friends that I am almost completely open with (one of which I have a crush which I haven't told him about this being the only issue i keep private) where as this week when i have been doing my volunteer job which 10-6 Monday days to Thursdays I have had only one attack, yet when i hang out with my closest friends after work, I have had 2-4 episodes on average a night. The only thing i have noticed that causes these attacks is me fear I'm going to have one, yet the rest of the time after an attack; I can never think why I've had one and usually struggle to remember what i was thinking prior to having an episode. I need help guys:tears: and I'm not sure what is causing the issues.
It's unfortunate that you didn't talk to your doctor about it. Next time you see them, it would be a good idea to ask your mum not to witness the consultation. You're old enought to be alone with your doctor and talk to them in private. Maybe you can give them a phone call to explain what the problem is. That's intersting that you seem to have those attacks mainly when you're around friends who know what's going on with you. It seems that you more or less manage to take a grip on yourself (for lack of better words) when you're around people who don't know about your problems, but that somehow, a part of you feels free to let go when you're around people who care about you and who will take care about you... Unfortunatly I run out of ideas on what's trigger of those attack and how to help you with them But I'll let you know if I come up with any idea. I hope that it's going to get better soon (*hug*) Cécile
Hi dark cheese (*hug*) It does sound like anxiety attacks. I'v also had them couple months ago. They are horrible!! I know how you feel. I remember I got them a lot when I was in a stressfull period in my life. I still get them sometimes when I am stressed but not as severe as they used to be. Try not to be so afraid of the attacks ( I know its easier said than done!). What helped me was to read stuff about anxiety and to understand what happens in your body and why it happends. Relaxationtapes also helped me a lot. The next time you feel like you're getting an attack don't try to resist it. Say to yourself: It's not gonna kill me, hurt me or make me pass out. Once you really believe that, the attacks will probably decrease in intensity and it won't effect you as much as it does now. It also looks like you're are going through a rough time. Is there someone you can talk to about some of these issues? Take care. (*hug*)
The only thing that seems to help me relax during an attack is completely retreating all extremities into my hoodie and having a cigarette (I know filthy habit but it seems to be one of the few things that helps) See I am one of those people who talks a lot but truly say nothing, I fear worrying or upsetting my friends, or let on how truly in peril my life can get at times. I don't want to burden my friends with the problems I have, as usually they have their own stuff to deal with(also the is list longer than your arm). Tonight I had my worst attack so far which lasted over half an hour to an hour where I was almost complete unable to think, and I felt the worst I have in my life .I had to try my hardest to find excuses for how I was behaving. As few acquaintances came round to a friends I was spending the night at, these acquaintances where completely twisted on drugs and managed to make the whole ordeal 10x worse. I think some of my episodes may be caused by fear on confrontation, which is I Hate(to the point where i would rather stab myself) to confront people even when they deserve it or be confronted as no matter what the outcome of the situation I always feel about 100x times worse than before it. I fear that this whole issue is some how inter connected to the anxiety issue. Confronting people was beaten (I mean that in the literal sense) by a good thousand bullies who I stupidly decided to stand up to(while have no ability to fight what so ever). I now avoid confrontation like the plague, but am unsure about how to tackle this issue. I just can't seem to find the strength to face any of my issue's head on, I try as hard as I can to live in blissful ignorance of their existence. I fear all my years of avoiding my problems is what is causing them now, but I've ignored my issue's for so long I can't muster the courage to even face them. I would just much rather run away from them move on with my life as if they were non-existent. But I presume the root of most of my problems, even my phobia of confrontation also stems from my avoidance issues. With my avoidant personality I find it almost impossible to tackle my issue's as if I can avoid or pretend any problem I will as much as possible. In the past 24h I found with amount and the extent I bite my nails(I tear into the nail bed, and some times I bleed) is an socially acceptable form of self harm, and the amount of small minor self mutilation I have only just noticed I do is also self harm, which is really disconcerting me. All this combined with my previous issue's is really starting to worry me, about how mentally screwed up I am, and how close I am to the point where I should be committed to try salvage what is left of my sanity, or for my own protection from myself. I just don't know what the hell to do, or where to start dealing with my issue's as I fear my mind is going to snap under the strain some time soon.
I'm afraid you're right to think that those attacks are related to your other issues. And I'm not very surprised by the self-harming part... the more I read your new thread, the more it makes me think about myself around 10 years ago. I was depressed, I had severe attacks like the one you describe, I ended up addicted to self-harming (cutting, burning and scratching for the most part) and as a matter of fact, I always had troubles handling confrontation (it gets better with time, but I still have a huge aversion for any kind of conflicts.) This leaded me to the point I started to think I was becoming insane. What helped me getting out of there was that I finally decided to stop hiding what was happening to me to my parents and my friends. One particularly horrible evening (the evening I found out my best friend had a cancer), I decided that it was enough. First thing the next morning, I took an appointment with a therapist and with my doctor. I came back home the next week-end and spilled the bean to my parents. And one after the other I told every one of my friends what was going on. Things didn't get better over one night, but it get better. I have been in therapy for 5 years and was obliged to face many things about myself and my past I would have prefer not to. But doing that probably saved my life. And I have been lucky enough to get incredible support from my family and friends. I know everyone's path is different, but that's how things improved for me. I hope things are going to improve for you. If you need someone to talk to about your problems, you're welcome to PM me anytime. I always can listen, even when I can't do much to help. Take care, (*hug*) Cécile
well, I've been more honest, I've told most of my friends who see me on a regular basis. i also blurted it out to my dad, as i knew there was no other way I'd ever tell him. I don't want to tell my mum as she'll worry to much, and at the moment she's got enough on her plate. i found with my mate, who's 36 , she is very similar to me and is the only person who i can be completely open with who understands how i feel. i sort of see her as a second mum, as she is nice. where as my whole family is built on lying about your emotions to each other, no matter which generation i look at. well all lie to each other and pretend our lives are ten time happier than they are. Today since I've been honest with people i feel like a ton of weight is of my shoulders. My biggest concern is worrying people as i have many problems as you probably can tell by what i have written. I am so good at pretending my problems don't exist, one friend today were shocked by the amount of different issue's i have. well hopefully I'll eventually get passed these issue's, Cecile i know you said the doctor get me medication for attacks. but due to this summer and the amount of illicit drugs i have taken, i have finally come to the conclusion all drugs are bad for me, medical, recreational and legal. The only difference between any of the is a politicians opinion. P.s also for the past 3 weeks I've been detoxing, so i could be clean from a shite load of narcotic's could this also have anything to do with my issue's?
It's great that you've been able to talk about the problem to your friends and your father. I hope they'll be able to provide you support to get through this. I totaly can relate to the feeling that you've got a ton of weigh of your shoulder. Keeping all this on your own must have been a very hard and painful experience. I know you said you don't like bothering people with your issues, just try to keep in mind that friends are supposed to be there in the good times and in the bad times as well. When friends of mine are having a problem and talk to me about it, I never think "Why can't that jerk keep that for themselves, they are ruining my day." What I think is "Dear, that must be painful, what can I do to help them out ?" So try not to be scared of bothering them and let them help. On a side note, congratulations for detoxing during 3 weeks. That's a huge step. How does this affects your issues, I don't know, but it is very possible that it is affecting you in some way. But that's definitly a good job, keep going Take care (*hug*) Cécile
