The responses I got

>>>I found many of the responses I received in my coming out process to be very awkward and make me think that everyone else is not fully sure of themselves. Some people went to great depths to ask how I know

The vast majority of people who ask "How do you KNOW?" don't do so because they're questioning their sexuality. They're doing so because it's unfamiliar territory. They know zero about homosexuality, and don't understand at all what it's like. So the smart move isn't to immediately assume that they must be gay as well, but to simply educate them on your discovery process. Your first inklings, how you examined it, how you came to the conclusion. If it DOES turn out that they're gay, they'll now have a template to follow. If it doesn't, they're simply now better educated.

Lex

 

^ To elaborate on what Lex said, it's kind of easy to fall into the trap of assuming that everybody is secretly gay or has latent homosexual tendencies when you first come out, because in your enthusiasm you'll start to read homoeroticism into all kinds of situations that you might not have otherwise considered it a factor in. But now that it's at the forefront of your consciousness, you might tend to overcompensate in that area.

Bottom line - the chances of people who ask, "How did you know?" using the question as a way to gauge their own sexuality is pretty slim. It's a really common question targeted at homosexuals because queers are only 10% of the adult population, and the other 90% sometimes has fundamental problems processing a variant sexuality that they do not relate to and do not share.

It's like me asking someone, "What is sky diving like?" I'm not necessarily asking because I want to sky dive, I'm asking because I have absolutely no experience with sky diving.

 

I would consider someone asking me "how you do know?" to mean "are you sure?"
I think Maverick is right, that you're seeing "gay signs" everywhere because its something your focusing on a lot right now. I doubt anyone would ask you that question to try to figure out their own orientation.

 

Haha, amen to that!

 

I think you can take it that they meant that your life will be easier for you now that you've come out and that you can be yourself, not that life is any easier for gay people.

Just remember, most people aren't gay, so it's natural for them to be a little confused and curious about the whole thing.

 

^^^ oh yes definately that. Its not easier to be gay, its easier to be yourself when you understand that its okay to be different from the norm. That's what I'm finding out about myself.