I can't take it anymore.

I'm really sorry you're having a hard time right now. I wish I could help.

Life is hard, and for some it's a lot harder than it is for others.

I don't know how old you are, but assuming that you're in your teens, you really have no idea where life is going to take you. You're world is really small right now compared to how big it gets when you go to university, or move out, or get a job, or move to a different city, etc.

That doesn't help you right now though. Telling someone that you feel that way might help you feel better right now. Tell your parents, or doctor, or counsellor at school, or crisis hot line, or friend, or relative, or teacher. If life is already unbearable, doing that wouldn't make it worse, would it? Tell one (or all) of those people that you are feeling really down, and that you need some help.

I really don't think we're intended to try and make it through life all by ourselves. We need other people, and other people need us, to help along the way.

I have felt the way you have. But I already had a therapist that I liked and trusted, and the morning that I wanted to end it all, I called him. And I went to his office. And he took me to the hospital to speak to a crisis counsellor. And I saw my own family doctor. And I started taking some medication. And I continued with my addiction therapy and recovery program. And things did get better. And life didn't seem so dark and lonely. And I occassionally would 'stumble and fall'. But I had people around me that I had engaged to help and support me, and that's what they did. And life got better. And then, when I least expected it, and wasn't even looking, I 'found' someone new. And I love them. And they love me. And I feel like the luckiest guy around!

And all this can happen to you too - but only if you're alive. All bets are off if you're dead.

Why not see what happens tomorrow? PM if you want to talk more.

 

dont be up set. every one at EC likes you and every thing we get better for you!!! i have bad times also some times . im sure things will get better for you(*hug*)

 

Sorry you're going through so much...

Ultimately life is about finding the strength to deal with difficult situations. It's about managing your thoughts so you don't constantly add to your own difficulties. Depression isn't caused by the difficulties we endure- it's caused by our reaction to those difficulties.

You're wrong when you say there's nobody you can totally trust. You're wrong when you say there's nobody you can talk to. The secret is in trusting yourself- in being the kind of person that you can admire and respect. It begins with you. You can always talk with yourself. The reason you don't like your friends is because you don't like yourself.

You said your life is pointless. What would change that? What if you worked harder in school? What if you developed your artistic or musical talents? What if you became a source of help for your family instead of causing them constant concern? Are you capable of changing some of your habits & negative thought patterns? Then make it so!

The more you say your life is empty, the more you brainwash yourself into believing it. What would make your life empty? That you don't have one specific person to talk with and love you right at this moment? That's where you're at today but why in the world would you believe it won't change if you make the effort to change it?

You're worth fighting for! But it begins with you. God loves you but you've got to start loving yourself. Love yourself whether you're gay or depressed or alone. Those are just things about you. You're much bigger than any of that.

Hey look- it's easier to quit than it is to muster the energy and courage to face up to all of this. But I don't think for a moment that you need an easy way out like suicide or early death. Struggle builds character. It increases understanding. It builds strength and wisdom.

Change your self talk from I can't to I can! Stop being so concerned with yourself. Think about other people, about going out of your way for them. Get a dog and treat him like his happiness is more important than your own. You've got to get outside of yourself.

You also may need medication (or different medication) to get you back on track!

Your death would end every possibility there could be for you. You would never read another great book, listen to a great CD, enjoy another sunset, discover the magic of making a relationship work, or find out that indeed- you can take it.

Good luck and all the best!

Tim

 

Mate,

All the others have said what I would say. If the life you want doesn't come to you, you go to it. We can all do that. It's just that sometimes you need a helping hand. But nobody can help you if you don't seek that help by telling someone how you feel - Doctor, close family member - anybody that can steer you in the right direction. We all need help as some stage of our life. No one can do it alone - least of all you.

Talk to someone, get the help you need. Those that have been through what you're going through say it gets better. It will for you - but you can't do it on your own.

Please don't do anything stupid. Those that you leave behind will suffer for ever. People that DO love you. I know you don't want that.

Hopefully, speak to you later on AIM.

Be strong.

 

hey take this from me. i've been to hell in back on this topic and i'm still here aren't i?

suicide doesn't make your problems go away. it makes you die. like really die. dead. i was looking through the cards at this one store and i came upon the 'sympothy' section. i pretended that i had killed myself and i was a relative/friend of me looking for a sympothly card to send. i was like which cards would they pick.

i could only look so long before my eye teared up and i had to walk away. sometimes when you think death in the answer we are only seeking to end out current problems and thinking that eternal blackness would be good. but when you die you can't go back. you can't say well it looks like everything is better i want to go back. no. you die. they find your body. they cry and freak. they call the police or ambulance. they take your body to a funeral home. they make you look good. they display your body. relaitve and friends and people you didn't know cared about you gather. they send cards and cry. they hold each other. those closet to you can barely contain themselves. there is the funeral. no need to say furthere. they deal with your body. then your parents and guardians deal out your stuff. they clean out your locker.

but its not over. first holiday comes there is reminising. and every single holiday every single year. every christmas, birthday, deathday, ect. they think of what you would be doing, they have memorial services. they cry. everytime your family member walks by your room, your friends pass you locker and glance at it thinking of you standing there, they cry.

why would you want to cause all of this trouble and all of this grief? just so you can sleep? you can't just turn your back on all this. and just think of the progress you have taken. from a baby, to a todler, to a kid, to a teen. why would you go through all of those trials and good times just to end your life now?

and it can get so much better! there are things to live for. getting married, moving out, new friends, new good memories. yes there will be harm times to, but thats life. and how can you know good times apart if you only had good.
and plus its the trials that make you a stronger, tougher, more unique person! you really can get through this!

maybe you just need some therapy and meds for a chemical inbalance. or maybe its just a lot of bad days that will soon be changing.

please just for me and your friends here at EC even if you can't do it for anyone else or even yourself. just keep pushing on. you are a strong person. you CAN do this. giving up will never get youb anywhere. trying will. and it would be so selfish to cause all that pain to those who DO love you.

Please feel free to PM ANYTIME. or AIM or MSN or anything. i will be there for you. i'm not suicidal any longer. even if i'm still depressed. i'm fighting. just like i know you can.
lots and lots of (*hug*) 's
-Morgan

 

Like evryone said above, you have to get used to life, it's life, and not only you feel depressed, we all do, there are even people who feel worse than you do, but the important thing is to pick yourself up when you fall

If you are in your teenage years, it's a horrible time. You got weird feelings and emotiosn every second, and the thought of dying maybe oon your mind all the time

Ok, if you dont wnat me to say everything will be better or you will feel better, i just want to say, be strong, if life wnats to step on you, step on it, if life is tough, be tougher than it. Everyone was borned to be unsatisfied, to feel pain, but dont let life pull you down. Life is not fair, but you are the one who make it fair

And dont be to hard on yourslef, just tell people ho you feel. I know that you dont trust anyone, but, is'nt it better to tell someone how you feel?

And dont die, if you dont knwo how it feels like after death, and dieing is not the answer. If you die, you will miss lots if good thing in life, and you can not do things you wanna do, i know you feel depressed but that dosnet mean you dont ahve goals. Good thinsg maynot be here yet, but that dosent mean they wont be here forever, you just have to keep on living, becaus ethat is what you were borned for. Life is like a rope consisting of 2 little ropes, one is good;uck, one is badluck, if only badluck happens, then it is against the rule

I hoep you feel better, i dont knwo what else to say, but be strong please, to overcome the bad moments,

 

I feel really bad for you at the moment. Please believe me that every single person who has answered you here and probably many who haven't yet have been where you are at the moment and survived.

When you are in a dark and lonely place knowing that things might eventually get better in a indetermined future is not a lot of help but as Tim said "Depression isn't caused by the difficulties we endure- it's caused by our reaction to those difficulties." Take a good look at yourself and see if there is some way, even a tiny way, that you could change your reaction to something. Try to find something positive in a situation and hang on to that, don't look at the bad stuff.

You need help, you can't hope to go through all this on your own. I suggest that you go and see your family doctor and explain that you are having a really hard time of things and feel upset, lonely and depressed and even admit that you have suicidal thoughts because this is the only solution you see. You don't need to bring up your sexuality, lot's of teenagers have a really rough time of it. Your doctor will either be able to refer you for councelling or give you some medication to get you through the worst of these moments.

I don't have the solution for you, just know that you are not alone. Suicide is NOT the solution, that I can tell you. I do really believe the saying 'what doesn't kill you makes you stronger'. Hang on in there, I won't say that things will get better but the darkness will pass eventually. On day your life will be filled with light, love and happiness but you are probably one of the people who have to traverse the cold, dark, lonely times before you get there. (&&&)

There will always be people here on EC to listen and talk to you. You are not alone, please believe me.