Weee.... So. Sup EC. How goes everything? It has been way too long since I checked in here, presumably meaning that none of you know me. Ah, I love it when that happens... xD Anywho. I have a strange and seemingly irresistible urge to post here. Why you may ask? Well. That's a very good question. If I knew why I was asking for help, this would all go soooooo much more smoothly. I swear. To put it simply, I seem to be unable to care about much of anything at the moment. School? meh. Work? meh. Relationships? meh. You get the picture. I mean... Other than not really 'caring' about it, I still did very well at school, and also do a very good job at work. It's not that I'm not 'doing' stuff, or being productive with my time. It's more that I couldn't care less about any of it. Now, onto the big draw card here. Relationships. *dun dun dun* As of recently, I seem to have... lost? Any real urge to pursue a relationship with more or less anyone (be they guy, girl or otherwise). Maybe I'm just cynical and otherwise emotionally bankrupt, but I dunno. I mean... There's no real 'physical' desire there. Also! To top off my random ramblings for today, I have also started questioning my sexuality again. Questioning is probably a bad way too put it though.... More, I have decided to completely reject the idea that a person can be defined by a single sexual identity. I'm sure that made more sense in my head than in words... So. That sums up my rant. Comment if you so desire. Roxas. <3 <3 <3
Hi Kaleb (*hug*), it's good to see you back. I'm just sorry you're not feeling that well. Have you been feeling depressed lately ? That could explain why you've lost interest in everything... I'm sorry you're questionning your sexuality again. Though I agree with you about the fact there is much more about someone than their sexual orientation, whatever it is. Maybe that is coming along with the fact you've lost interest in relationships for the moment ? That being said, 18 is still a very young age, you can go without being interested in relationship for a while. Maybe focusing on friends and on having a nice time with them would be enough as a goal for the moment. You might just need to take a break from the roallercoaster of love for the moment. I hope you're going to feel better soon, and see you around. Take care, Cécile
Thanks Cecile. *hug* Writing all of that out has surprisingly helped (as for some reason it usually does...). Anyway, I'm feeling a whole bunch better now that it isn't some stupidly early hour of the morning. ^^ Thanks for the reply! I'm gonna head off to work now, and try to have fun. I got a weekend job at a Game store, which is pretty awesome. Luv you all~! Kaleb.
I'm glad you're feeling a bit better. Sometimes just writting down what is bothering you helps to get it off your chest and to put things into perspective. I'm glad you're having fun at work Not everyone is so lucky. Take care Kaleb, (*hug*) Cécile
Nice to see you passing by again, Kaleb! Well, even if you’re feeling better, I’m not going to pass up the opportunity to comment! I usually start feeling “meh” about things when they become too routine. When I’m doing good at work, and everything goes right, I can actually be “meh” about it for weeks at a time. If things go well, it means I don’t have to apply my full attention to it and I start to get bored. Familiarity breeds contempt, as they say. Then, when something goes wrong or something entirely new comes up, I usually need to be more attentive and I start getting a bit more passionate. New things mean new skills to learn, new people to talk to, new situations to tackle etc… So maybe you’re just a bit too comfortable where you are, which causes the lack of drive. Then again, it’s not necessarily a bad thing. If you’re doing good at school and work, it can be good to have a couple of carefree weeks. And it seems that getting that weekend job already adds some variety! As for relationships: I wouldn’t say that not being interested in them is all that abnormal. Some people can’t survive half a day without a relationship, others only get interested if they meet the right person. Maybe it’s a good thing that you don’t desire relationships for their own sake, as it might make room for wanting a relationship just because you find an awesome person (regardless of gender). Anyways, if you keep feeling like this for a longer time, if you start to feel worse, and if you stop being able to do well in school of work, it’s best to look for more help. But otherwise, I think things will be fine!
