I've decided that it's time to start coming out to the people who I love the most: my immediate family. However, I'm struggling with two things. I have this thing in my head where I tell myself that I don't want to waste other peoples time telling them trivial things, and to me being gay is a little trivial. It doesn't really change anything for them or me really, but I still feel compelled to do it. Like I'm keeping a secret from them, even though it really doesn't have to be their business. It's kind of confusing. Also, I find that simply stating that I'm "gay" is like adding a label to who I am ("Yeah, my brother is gay"). When I tell them I want it to not be a label, but a reality (if you know what I'm getting at). Any advice/wisdom out there on these things?
I do not believe that being gay is trivial. It's part of your identity - a huge part of who you are. If you feel compelled to tell them, then do it! You love them and they deserve to know. Secondly, my guess is that they most likely won't treat it as a label. Your sexual preference is quite real and should be treated as such. I know if my son was bringing somebody to dinner, I'd definitely want to know in advance that that person is the same gender as him. Who you love is always important to your family (whether they support you or not) and I assure you that unless you tell them in such a way that it sounds like a label and/or a trivial thing ("Hey, pass the carrots Fred, I'm gay. This soup is really good.") it'll affect them. Best of luck to you, mate. (&&&)
If you are concerned about it seeming like a label or something trvial maybe just make sure that you tell them that you want them to know because it's a part of who you are, and you thought it was important to tell them since they are so important in your life. If you explain why youre telling them it might help them realize you are trying to share part of your life with them because they are special to you.
