I have been coasting along as a bisexual now for a while. Out to all friends 18 months ago, out to family 8 months ago...and I'm really happy. It telly sucks nothing with a guy has yet developed, and it also sucks nothing with a girl has progressed either. (I swear I feel like I'm destined to be single forever). But that's not the issue here. I have only really started to take notice of the way I behave, just because now I'm out, I'm truly being myself. So all of that reflects from my personality, whereas before, because I was hiding secrets and scared people would find out, I wasnt bring truthful to who I was. So it's not until now that I've noticed how fluid my personality has become. I get that when you're with different people you might act a different way, buy that's just it... I'm not acting. Our social group is made up of both guys and girls, all straight. The girls I can get along well with, talking about sexy batman and what you would do to Robert Down Jr. given half a chance (everything)!! I wouldn't say I fall into the stereotype people perceive a gay guy to be like, I'm not camp, I'm not into fashion or Lady GaGa (you know, all those labels that people seem to associate with gay guys *rollseyes*. Then again, I'm definitely not a stereotypical straight jock type either. My point is, when I'm with the guys, I become more and more of that jocky type. Loud, lairy, immature humour ... generally very 'boyish'. Before, I wasn't like that so much. But I'm not acting differently on purpose. I just am who I am. I'm more of a 'lad' since I came out. But I'm also more 'gay' as well. it's all very confusing, but none of it is on purpose...anyone know what the he'll I'm trying to say. And forgive that incredulous amount of labels in my post, I'm trying to move thoughts from my brain into words and as I am confused as he'll I'm trying to make everything as simple to follow as possible.
well in my opinion if you've 'come out' you've released aspects of your personality not seen by others before but if the 'jocky' type is how you are then there is no need to change that lol x i hope this helped ...
You sound just like me. Never been with a guy any further than kissing either, and my recent luck with women has been AWFUL. I do the same thing you do, my behaviour changes radically between different groups of people. I can be as gay as a daffodil and as straight as a front row forward (or a linebacker for you americans), depending on who i hang out with, and it all just seems to come naturally to me... what kind of advice are you looking for?
This is a good thing! It sounds like being yourself allows you to be close to your friends of both genders. Different people bring out different aspects of our personalities and I think it is completely normal to act different around different friend groups.... to me you sound like a well rounded and well liked guy!
I dunno, actually :d I think I'm just looking for reassurance that there are others out their similiar. I am just a bit confused because of the lack of control I have over it and wondered whether it was normal. Thanks guys for the reassurance!
You are just simply human and I'm sure the same thing happens to people all the time. We just act differently depending on who we are around with. It so just happens that you act "straighter" at times and "gayer" some other times. My friends always love to point out my "gay" times and my "fabulous" times haha There is nothing to worry about, just a natural reaction of being a social being As long as you are comfortable with your actions then don't worry about it.
i'm struggling to understand myself socially in a similar way... while i'm not into girls (100% gay) i do like a lot of guyish things, and don't identify myself as just "one of the girls". but i get confused as to how i'm supposed to act and when. i've found lately that i feel stupid and fake when i'm putting on more of a gay persona around gay people, and similarly i feel fake when i'm trying to act tough around straight guys. i'm glad you started this thread, it's good to know others are in similar situations.
don't have to act at all.You don't have to act like girl ..because you are not a girl! Having a gay persona as stupid as having straight persona.
i've been realizing that more and more lately. it's nice to just be who you are. although you still see so many younger gay guys striving to fit in the gay mold, so you really have to know who you are and be confident in it lest you succumb to the pressure to fit in. those are my thoughts on it, anyhow.
