Hi, So there is this guy I really like. I really can't stop thinking about him. But, the last few nights, I've been having dreams about him throughout the night. The first one was when I was told he wasn't single anymore and the other one was when (brace yourself for the weirdness...) we were on skype together, and he was stripping for me. Then a conversation came up on the screen between him and this girl called Cat (a friend of a friend that knows him) where she was like "I didn't know you were gay?!" and then he was like "it's pretty obvious. but i'm only doing this bcus this guy is crazy and horny - I don't even like him." -- It was THE weirdest dream I've ever had in my entire life. Obviously, something along these lines was embedded in my subconscious but what does it all mean?? It seems like in "real life", I am invisible to this guy - I see him once in a blue moon and I don't have any way in which to introduce myself to him without it being staged, weird or just plain creepy. I have tried adding him on fb but to no avail. Any advice you could give me on where to go from here would be greatly appreciated, Kaiser927.
The dreams suck, don't they? I have the same issue, but I think I want to be a hero subconciously so my crushes wind up dismembered, injured, in a bad relationship, etc I have to rescue them. But enough about me. I think it's better if you try to introduce yourself. You could go up to him and say, "Hi, I'm [mutual friend's name] friend and he/she said you were cool and I should talk to you." Or if he's wearing a band shirt or something talk about that. It's always better to ask questions too. You don't want to go on some tirade about yourself or dessert or something. Have him talk about himself. That way it shows him that you're interested in becoming friends with him and not interested in having someone to listen about your accomplishments. If things go well, maybe you could have coffee or something with him to get to know him better. Do you know if he's gay or not?
Thanks for replying. I really appreciate it The things is, our mutual friend connection is a weak one. One of my best friends is in classes with him but she doesn't know him. Also, I added him before on fb when I was drunk and I screwed up big time and emailed him as to why I added him - something along the lines of "I saw you around and you looked cool...blah blah blah" << what a douche! Anyways, from then on, I always think he thinks I'm a creep and the thing is, when I do see him, he is always with other people (he's a very popular guy!) and I almost don't feel comfortable in going up to him and finding some sort of connection in order to talk to this guy. I would totally go to coffee with him, if a connection can be established - its tough. It almost in wanting something you can't have as such...do you see my point? I do know he's gay. But, he is the first guy I've really had a major crush on.
>>>Obviously, something along these lines was embedded in my subconscious but what does it all mean?? >>>It seems like in "real life", I am invisible to this guy - I see him once in a blue moon and I don't have any way in which to introduce myself to him without it being staged, weird or just plain creepy. I have tried adding him on fb but to no avail...I do know he's gay. But, he is the first guy I've really had a major crush on.... You more or less answered your own question. What more can you do? Go introduce yourself. Or just keep him as fantasy fuel. Depends on your level of confidence. Lex
Don't care about your dream.there is a thread about weird dreams and if they were mean anything we would all be in jail now:lol: Go say hi and you can start a conservation about class,one stupid teacher,something funny blabla if you can't find something to talk about. Don't act like he is a moviestar.Show your confidence (but don't be a diva) then things will be ok.Girls,boys..confidence is best charm. Noone can say you will date but at least you can start connection with him.Think simple,usually your plans doesn't work because of excitement & unexpected things. I recommend you do not show him that you have crush on him when you meet him.Stay cool,don't go so fast but don't be extremely friendly.You can be flirty after some good vibes. For me, any time i look confident,cool (but not egomaniac ),funny it worked.You don't have to feel confident..just look like that. You are not gonna say him to suck my balls..just simple hi..How can it go bad?
Sounds kinda like this one guy at my school. I believe he's a senior, and I haven't talked to him... He's gay. Or bi.. either way he likes guys.... He is the leader of the GSA, so I plan on going in there on the next meeting and establishing a connection.
Like what the Joker said, be confident in yourself and talk to him. Since he is gay, do you know if he's part of any campus organizations, like a GSA or something? If so you could go to one of those meetings. Then when you see him, you can say, "Hey I saw you at such and such meeting." Or he might do the same for you. Don't flirt too hardcore, you'll come off as desperate. You definitely don't want that. You've got time left in the semester to introduce yourself. Don't rush into anything, especially if you feel uncomfortable. If it makes you feel better, I met both of my girlfriends by being funny (if not a little too cocky) and confident. They really liked that about me. Most people do.
He's not a member of the GSA. I've got to the point now where I've just got over him. Its gonna be soo hard for something to happen because we have no connections to introduce ourselves with and I think I've already come across as quite creepy with him. Plus, if I befriend him, then I KNOW I'd want it to be more than that and it would just annoy me and like you said, I'm worried I'd flirt hardcore which is not a good sign. I really appreciate the comments guys, thanks. Plus, we're both only freshman, I'm studying abroad for my sophomore year but when I come back, we'll still both have senior year so I'm just gonna go with the flow...
It kind of sounds like you lack confidence. You honestly dont need a connection to introduce yourself. Thats the reason for an introduction. If you like him then be bold. Even if you study abroad (which i think is totally awesome) you can still get to know the guy. Fantasizing over him and obsessing is just going to hurt you in the long run. It impairs the likeliness that you will find happiness with someone, and increases the likeliness that you wont be able to handle rejection.
Thanks TyRawr. I'm definitely lacking in confidence when it comes to this and you couldn't have put it more right with the last bit you wrote. I do want to introduce myself to him but I'm worried that because of the creepy email thing I did when I was drunk (even though that was back in early december), I'm worried he remembers it and is gonna be creeped out. I know I'm over-thinking this. I guess I just gotta go for it, when I see him - but not come across as a bit OTT. Also my friends are kinda divided about the whole situation too, they are saying that he is hot/beautiful, which he is, and that decreases my confidence in going up to him and then some are like "don't befriend him because you'd just be even more upset if he doesn't 'like' you" which makes me question whether I should or not...hmm... :bang:
