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My mom is suddenly acting strange about me moving out in a few months?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by MusicIsLife, Mar 5, 2011.

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  1. MusicIsLife

    MusicIsLife
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    I guess "strange" isn't the right term. Protective or negative might work better, but she says shes being "realistic"

    Let me explain. I've started looking at apartments to move out. the ideal time would be in july, so I should start looking in april, but i look from time to time now, and yesterday I found what I saw as a great deal.

    It was a 450/month apartment with everything included, and it was a 2.5 with cats allowed. So I showed my mom and all she said was the following: it's a basement apartment it'll be musty and you'll have an athsma attack, it's a basement apartment and you'll get broken into. Theres no balcony, its not for july.

    We've had two semi-major arguments about it already, and I can't figure out if shes just being a mom, or if these are some realistic worries. Advice?

    PS. we live almost in farmland. If we drove 20 minutes west we'd hit nothing but fields and this apartment is extremely close to downtown montreal.
     
    #1 MusicIsLife, Mar 5, 2011
  2. Flyers2011

    Flyers2011
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    I think she's just scared of you moving out. My mom is the same way, almost. She loves you and she's concerned that you'll fail (even if you won't) because when you're in the real world she can't really protect you anymore.

    She's afraid of losing you, which every parent is. Just give her time to deal with it, and when you do move out, tell her that you'll call her and you'll invite her over. Let her feel like she's part of your life still. I think she's just handling things in a different way than other parents do. But everyone does. Just give her time and don't give up your search.
     
    #2 Flyers2011, Mar 5, 2011
  3. Lexington

    Lexington
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    She's presumably having a bit of premature empty-nest syndrome. She's presumably scared of losing you. There's probably a good dollop of "being protective mom" in there, as well. I wouldn't worry about it too much. Whenever she critiques any place you look at, simply look at it as an opportunity to see some of the negatives that you might have overlooked, and thank her for her input. Then do as you see fit. :slight_smile:

    Lex
     
    #3 Lexington, Mar 5, 2011
  4. TyRawr

    TyRawr
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    Do you and your mom have a spousal relationship? It sounds like you do. If this is the case then it probably her just worried about being alone when you are gone, and she may even be unaware of the way she is acting. Its only natural that our mothers are concerned when we move out, but if there is a spousal relationship then it is a completely different scenario
     
    #4 TyRawr, Mar 5, 2011
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