So there was this thing at school. A big, messy thing. A friend...no, a guy I know (Riley), and another friend (Phil) had a 'secret' that they were telling another friend, or a guy in my circle of friends at least (Mike), and they were making a big annoying deal over it. Anyway, I thought they were just being dicks and annoying us all, with some fake secret, because they surely know that we are the sort of people who have to know every little piece of gossip, but then Mike was acting really strange after they 'told' him. Another friend and I were bugging him to tell us, but he said it was "too creepy and wierd". Now, this, to anyone else might be a sign that it isn't something we need to know, but to us, it was a blatant lie. NOTHING is too wierd to tell us, and he knows that. So I sorta dropped it, but it was still bugging me. Later, before a year meeting, I asked Riley, and he said that it wasn't 'about' Mike, but it involved him. Then I started to get a little suspicious. Once in the year meeting, a friend (Dani) asked Phil, and he apparently told her just like that. I don't really believe that he would blab out to her like that when he had been bugging everyone else by not doing so. Anyway, she tells me that the 'secret' that Riley and Phil told Mike was that I had a crush on Mike a few months ago. While this is true, I didn't think that it was entirely true. I was sure they were still trying to annoy us. Normally I wouldn't trust either Riley OR Phil with any sort of secret; last time I told Riley a secret he went off blabbing to everyone. The problem is, I didn't tell them. There was no way they could have heard from me that I'd had a crush on Michael. So that means someone must have told them. Anyway, then things started to get VERY messy. After we found this out, another friend (Penny) had a scream at Riley for being a dick and running around telling people shit, or something. I wasn't there, so I don't know the exact contents of her rant at him. So she was in a bad mood for the rest of the day, Riley tried to avoid us the rest of the day, and Michael, who I know is a huge homophobe, was still acting wierd. I don't even know if Michael does infact know that I had a crush on him. It was a stupid, and short lived little crush, that ended when I realised how much of a dick he really was, and it was ages ago, so I don't see why people would be talking about it now. So after all this mess I am confused, depressed and I feel a little betrayed.
This souds like typical teenager's stuff. All that you know is that two guys told a secret to a third one, in a definitly drama making manner. The best way to deflate it is just not to pay attention to it. There are no tangible proof that this could be about you, and even if it is, consider it is none of your business until one of them comes to talk to you about it. Until anything new happens, just act normal and don't pay attention to them. There's high chances that they'll find a new drama to play with within a few days. Take care, Cécile
First off, you still don't have any but the most circumstantial evidence that that's what the secret is. Secondly, they seem to be enjoying not telling you. I've oft found that a secret is worth precisely what you deem it to be worth. If you decide you don't care what it is, suddenly the value drops dramatically. And, oddly enough, it's often the case that a person is more likely to share that secret if they think you don't care about it! Even if the "secret" IS what you say, they'll never have any confirmation about it unless they ask you...which apparently they ain't gonna do. What to do? Let the entire matter drop. Completely and utterly. Don't angle, don't argue, don't whine. Pretend nobody told anybody anything. If you see whispering going on, tactfully look away - futz with your cell phone or something. When they finish, smile a bit and ask "Done?" When they say yes, continue on like nothing happened. Lex
Do not trust people.Don't have secrets at all or keep it to yourself.People betrays.Even the most loved ones. At least you got experience now.If that guy acts bad to you, you can say the truth."i had a little crush until i realized you are such a dickhead."
Since you've decided Mike is a jerk and a homophobe, it doesn't matter how he feels about you possibly once having liked him. If Dani knew about your crush prior to this incident, you have no real evidence that that's what the secret was--if she didn't, though, then it probably was the actual secret. Does Dani lie a lot? It seems like a strange lie, if it is one. Who did know about the crush? Did Penny know? In the current situation, I would think it's far more upsetting that someone betrayed your confidence than to think that this Mike guy who you don't really think is a friend might have some kind of problem with you. I'm guessing you told only female friends about the crush, so here's what I'm guessing happened: one of your female friends you told was either dating or interested in dating either Riley or Phil, and therefore her love-addled brain was unable to conceive of the possibility that he would blab. Who knows how the subject came up. Possibly he asked her. Anyway, she told him because it was just so obvious that she could trust such an amazingly super flawless gorgeous awesome guy. It was not an intensional betrayal.
It's all old news now, I guess. I'm sure that that was indeed the 'secret', but I still can't work out how Riley and Phillip could possibly have known that I had a crush on Michael. It seems impossible. And even more so, why would they bring this up now? I told my friends I had a crush on Michael MONTHS ago, and got over it around the same time too. So why would anyone bring up something so small, and so ancient right now? It is a mystery indeed. It was all such a big mess. Why does gossip have to exist? Guh. I also need to say this: "one of your female friends you told was either dating or interested in dating either Riley or Phil, and therefore her love-addled brain was unable to conceive of the possibility that he would blab. Who knows how the subject came up. Possibly he asked her. Anyway, she told him because it was just so obvious that she could trust such an amazingly super flawless gorgeous awesome guy." When hell freezes over, not even then. When flying-pigs take a summer holiday to a frozen hell, board the wrong plane and end up at Machu Pichu with a bunch of Muppets dressed in Victorian clothing.
>>>So why would anyone bring up something so small, and so ancient right now? It is a mystery indeed. It was all such a big mess. Something small and ancient wouldn't make you obsess about it, and start a thread about it on a messageboard looking for advice. Apparently, it ain't as small as all that. It's got enough weight and power that you're freaking out about it. Which is why I suggest not giving it that weight and power. If you treat it like it's no big deal, it ceases being a big deal. Lex
If they are making a "big deal" about it then they either A: want to tell you or B: are just doing it to get a rise out of you. So, call them on it. Tell to either tell you or fucking drop and stop being dicks. Then ask them which is it? Tell you or drop it? By the way love your signature Daria forever!!!!!!
