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Whats wrong with me?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Connor22, Mar 16, 2011.

  1. Connor22

    Full Member

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    I don't get it. I'm sorry, I've been out now for a year and quite bloody frankly I don't get what I'm doing wrong. It gets better? When?! All things seem to be getting around here is worse. I've somehow managed to work myself back into the closet to a good lump of my friends and gag bullying is a sport endorsed, sponsored by and monopolised by the local senior high and guess which factors name they've gotten their combined brain cell on? Mine. Woop. I hate it, I can't walk down the street without someone calling out "Connor queer" or "gay boy" or others I've managed to erase from my memory. Odds are, like every other thread I write this one will be scrapped because I'm probably gonna deem it "not worth the good folks of ec to complain about when there's others out there who are probably in worse situations than I am". Now about this back in the closet thing, long story short after being bullied out of my old group of friends who I am now friendly with again or something, I made a new group of friends who are oblivious somehow to my sexuality and frankly I don't want to tell them because every time I think about it I get a little story in my head of how it plays out, involving lots of tears and he loss of half of my social life and job. Neither of which are favourable and are also quite realistic. [/Rant]
     
  2. zerogravity

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    Well, I can't relate exactly to what you are going through - but I was pretty much outed in grade 9 and called fag and beaten up/ intimidated every day until I couldn't take it anymore. I changed schools and went wayyyy into the closet and it took me years to finally get the nerve up to come out. It was a very bad decision. I am still not out to my friends, and to be honest the thought terrifies me.

    Don't feel pressured to tell every new person you meet. Use your own judgement - tell the people you can trust. You will find a group of friends who accept you for who you are. Congrats at coming out at such a young age! I wish I did that!
     
  3. gaius

    gaius Guest

    Right, i'll try and make this brief
    1.
    If your friends cant accept you for who you are, they arent worth having (corny but true)
    2.
    Calling you queer is bullying and is unacceptable at school, i've worked in schools and that kind of bullying was going on in some areas too, you have to let teachers know though otherwise unless they catch it happening they won't know there is a problem.
    3.
    depending on where you live there will be laws protecting you from losing your job due to homophobia or discrimination, you can probably find these online
    4.
    My advice is simple regarding your friends, tell the ones you know and trust and ask them for help with the others, this doesn't always work but it helped me.

    I hope is does get better for you, and i think you'll find that most of your problems are down to very immature people, when i got to uni, i found most people (i mean like 99.99%) were absolutely fine with me being gay, i lived with 6 guys in first year and then 5 in second, yeah they make fun of me sometimes, but in the same friendly way i make fun of them, one guy drives terribly, another wears a stupid hat all the time. This is exactly the sort of thing groups of guys do, so feel free to make jokes about yourself and you may find people realise sexuality doesn't matter more quickly

    Ste x