Next step

I think the best thing to do is to tell him how you feel. In person. Not over a text or anything. Just be straight-forward and honest with him. You mentioned that he was a pretty good friend, so he probably won't be offended, especially since he is gay too.

When you talk to him, allow him to express how he feels too. Make sure he knows that you care enough about him that his feelings and opinions matter.

If he says, "I like you too." Then ask him if he wants to take things to the next level. If he says yes, then you go from there. But take things slow, don't jump into a relationship. If you jump you'll end up making things difficult and awkward.

If he says, "I just want to be friends." Then you'll have to stay at that. You don't want to continue to harp on your feelings for him you may put a lot of strain on your friendship. You don't want to lose a friend over something like this.

If he doesn't want to be more than friends with you, the only thing you can do is pick up the pieces and move on. Don't dwell on something that only hurts you.

But talk to him before you try to let him go. Good luck

 

The best thing, in my opinion, is just to ask him out, like on a date. This will make it clear that you are interested, without making a big deal about it.

It's also a different question. If you confess your feelings and want to know what his feelings are, you are sort of demanding that he have feelings for you already. But just asking someone on a date, it's more like you are asking if he'd be willing to find out if he could have feelings for you, if he could just try it out. It's more about whether he is open to the possibility or not than whether he already feels that way.

It's completely possible for someone who has never thought of you like that, to be willing to start thinking of you like that. You'll have a lot more success if you don't try to skip the beginning part of courtship. Don't ask the person you like to feel equally strongly about you right away, especially if your feelings for him have been growing for a while without you telling him--his feelings need time to grow, just like yours did.

By just asking for a date, you get the answer you need as to whether he could be interested, but if he says no, it isn't nearly as brutal. And he's more likely to say yes, because you aren't asking for as much. It isn't really fair to put him on the spot about how he feels about you, and expect him to already know.

Since same-sex interactions can be confusing, you want to be really clear that you are asking him out on a date, and not just a friendly outing, or whatever. You can make the question open-ended, and get to the details after he responds: "I was wondering if you would go out on a date with me sometime?"

If he says no, just say, "Okay, well, I thought I'd give it a shot." Then move on to some other conversation.

If he says yes, you can then set up your date. It's just a first date, but that can be the beginning of a relationship.

 

Maybe you don't have to say "date" and it could be more general, like ask if he wants to go see a movie or go out for food/drinks, go to a museum, whatever. I guess calling it a date makes your feelings more defined, but maybe work up to that after a few good times just doing stuff together. Maybe by hanging out together more he'll feel more for you and make a move or there will be a "moment" where you both have the urge to make a move. I dunno, just a thought. Good luck

 

As mnguy said, I agree that just hanging out with him would be the first step. If the extent of your friendship right now is just the occasional text or conversation, a good next step would be to continue to get to know each other. His feelings may become more apparent as you spend more time together and then you can more easily decide how to approach him with sharing your feelings.

 

Okay, but eventually, somebody has to actually make things clear. Sometimes people dance around each other forever, and neither one ever makes a move--and sometimes, he might end up in a relationship with someone else, when he really liked you all along, but neither of you ever did anything definitive.

Also, if you get the yes-or-no response, you prevent your feelings from building and building more when they are not returned. Often, if you put off getting a real answer, your feelings will keep growing more, and then if in the end he isn't interested, you feel much worse.

I really think asking him out is the best balance--it lets him know you are interested and gets an answer as to whether he could potentially be interested, but it doesn't leave him overwhelmed with the strength of your feelings.

 

Yes, good points about no one ever making a move and increasing feelings which might end with a bigger letdown or the guy going out with another dude. I just hope something good happens with this one

 

My recommendation is to keep it quiet for a while longer to the point where you know you are not going to be able to keep it quiet anymore. If you ask him on a date, you run the risk of making it awkward still. Especially in the case where you have not met the person online but in real life. Going on a date for some people are things that they do after they've developed an attraction towards your personality when in fact they've known you for a while, and for people who've just met it might be the start of a process of discovery.

In your case, if you have in fact talked for a while, I think that you are past that point. If you haven't started hanging out as good friends do yet, then, it's a perfect time to just go out and do something first. It is never too late to find the courage later on to let him know your feelings. If you have already went to movies or dinners together often, well, then it is time to make it known clearly when you are emotionally ready (i.e. Maintain your cool if he does not feel the same about you and is unwilling to)